“You're absolutely brooding. You've got that look.”
“What look?”
“The one that says you're thinking too hard about shit you can't change.” She hopped up onto the counter, legs swinging, completely at home in my space. “Troy's arrival got you twisted up.”
“I'm fine.”
“Declan. We've been friends for what, ten years? I know when you're lying.” She tilted her head, studying me with those sharp dark eyes that missed nothing. “Talk to me. What's really going on?”
I took a drink of coffee and bought time. “I don't know what you want me to say.”
“The truth would be nice.”
“The truth is complicated.”
“It always is. Say it anyway.”
I set the coffee down and ran a hand through my hair. “I raised him. Loved his mother. Tried to do right by him after she died. And somewhere along the way, he started hating me and I still don't know why. Don't know what I did wrong or what I could have done different. Just know that every time he looks at me, all I see is resentment.”
Mara was quiet for a beat. Then she said, “Come on. We're going shopping.”
“What?”
“Shopping. You know, that thing normal people do when someone's coming to stay. You need groceries.” She hopped down from the counter. “And sitting here brooding isn't gonna help anyone.”
“I'm not?—”
“You keep saying that. It's still not true.” She grabbed her coffee and headed for the door. “Get your coat. We're leaving in five minutes whether you're ready or not.”
I followed because arguing with Mara was a waste of energy and because she was probably right.
The grocery store was too bright and too crowded for a weekday morning. Mara grabbed a cart, shoved it at me, and started navigating the aisles like she had a plan. I followed, trying not to think too hard about what I was doing.
“What does he eat?” she asked, stopping in front of the produce.
“I don't know. Whatever's there.”
“Helpful. Thanks.” She started grabbing vegetables anyway. Stuff that looked fresh and green. “When was the last time he was home?”
“Six years. Maybe seven.”
“And you didn't pay attention to what he ate?”
“He avoided me most of the time. Hard to pay attention when he wasn't around.”
Mara shot me a look. “You're making this difficult.”
“I'm being honest.”
“Same thing with you.” She tossed carrots into the cart. “Fine. We'll get basics. Stuff anyone would eat.”
We moved through the store. Mara filled the cart while I pushed it and tried not to feel pathetic. Bread. Milk. Eggs. Coffee.
“Beer?” Mara asked, pausing in front of the alcohol section.
“Yeah. Get the good stuff.”
She raised an eyebrow. “The good stuff or the stuff he actually likes?”
