Oakley
It’s the full moon tonight and I don’t know where you are, but I hope that you’re safe. Miss you so much, Haze. Love you.
It was probably stupid to text my sister, but as I sat in my room, mind rippling with frustration over Atlas, I couldn’t help myself. Sending it felt like I was still able to reach her somehow, even though I knew that wasn’t really possible.
Going to the corner, I pulled out various crystals, setting the ones I wanted to use in their own pile before arranging eight of them into a circle, representing the full moon above. I looked out my window, making sure the slip of her illumination would cradle the stones. Then I took out the bowl, flower petals, and meteor dust for my offering.
Getting up from the floor, I walked to the night stand to grab my ceremonial knife. When I opened the drawer, my attention snagged on mytreasure boxof toys. All of them overwhelmed me.
The last thing I felt like doing right now was recharging. I grabbed the knife and snapped it shut, reaching a decision. There was still another month probably before I lost access to my magic completely. That gave me thirty more days to make a choice about what I wanted to do. Hopefully by then Hazel would be back so I could weigh the pros and cons with her, and I’d have a clearer idea of how to move forward.
“Moon Mother, take this offering in thanks.” I began, pricking the tip of my thumb, letting a few drops of crimson hit the blackened stone mortar. Dropping the other ingredients into the mortar, I took the pestle and crushed it together until it became a thin paste. Then I scooped some in my fingertips and covered my palms. “I’m sorry I’ve hidden from your gaze all these moons. I’m sorry if it seems like I don’t want what you’ve given. I just don’t know how to move forward.”
I held my hands up in supplication, the radiant glow of her essence bathing my palms with warmth. My Desire pricked beneath my skin, a small bit of magic sifting out of me with my plea. “And please, wherever she is, keep my sister safe under your light.”
Slowly, the granules of paste vanished from my hands, disappearing with the slip of magic.
Knock, knock.
Knock, knock, knock, knock.
“Go away, Atlas,” I groaned, glad I’d at least made it through my offering before he’d come back.
“Not Atlas…”
Fuck.
I got up and shuffled into the hallway before opening the front door. Lynx stood on the porch, a covered plate in his hands. The scent of crisp sugar and decadent chocolate wafted from the cracks in the foil, making my stomach grumble. “What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be home with your husband in the thralls of full moon rituals and…whatnot?”
“I had to see you,” he said, attention flitting behind me. “Is now an okay time to talk?”
I crossed my arms. “If you’re here to tell me what’s going on, then feel free to come in.” He ran a hand through his dark-blond waves, the other gripping the plate tightly. Stepping inside, his eyes darted around the space, as if he could find what he needed to say somewhere on the onyx walls. “Atlas isn’t here, if that’s where your mind is wandering.”
His shoulders relaxed visibly at my words, though he didn’t admit anything aloud.
“I don’t like how things were left earlier.” Walking over and placing the plate on the counter, he peeled back the foil. “And look, I brought desserts.”
There were chocolate-covered strawberries, a slice of chocolate cake, and a piece of berry tart with a cup of dirt—a supernatural childhood staple—in a little plastic cup with a spoon set next to it. It all looked divine. I swiped my chin with my thumb, certain there’d be some drool there.
“Do you really think apology pudding makes everything go away? Like the fact that you never told the APD to look for my sister?”
His lips pressed into a thin line, the veins in his neck pulsing with tension. After a moment, and a deep inhale, he spoke. “I promise I’m searching for her. I just can’t really say anything else.”
I crossed my arms, taking inventory of the desserts again. Even though they had my mouth watering, I refused to take bribery treats from someone I couldn’t trust. I wasn’t some toddler that could be paid off with chocolate and sent on my merry way. “I’m sorry but that’s not going to cut it when I don’t know where my sister is or if she’s safe.”
“You’re right.” He placed his hand on the door, making sure it stayed quiet as he shut it. His eyes were glued to the nursery, and he lowered his voice to a whisper. “And I want to tell you the truth, but I really can’t. Even if I did, I’m not sure you’d believe me.”
This was true. It was hard to believe someone when they’d already been caught in a lie. Two, in fact. But there was something I had that could help. “You really want to tell me the truth?”
“I do,” he replied, seemingly sincere.
“Hold on.” I went into the bedroom, rifling through my old leftover potions with shaky hands.
Lynx had been the first witch to help me feel welcome here. Beyond that, he’d seemed to genuinely care about Aspen and me. Sure, we hadn’t known each other long, but the comfort I felt when he was around was real and reassuring. At least it had been, before it’d been snatched away when I needed it most. With Hazel gone and things so precarious between Atlas and I, Lynx had been a lifeline. Now I didn’t know what to trust. I thought there was something taking root between us, even if it was hard to understand why he’d be interested in me.
Maybe I’d just wanted to believe it…
Finally, I found what I’d been searching for, grabbing a vial filled with dark-green liquid, specks of golden dust floating within the tincture. I covered the lid and swirled the glass in my fingers, blending the settled bits as I walked back into the living room.
