Now it’s Judd and Zoey who stare at Clay.
“Shit,” says Clay. “I have a pretty good guess. I’ll go talk to him. Make yourselves comfortable. If this takes a while and you want to leave, we’ll catch up later.”
“Was that all the milk?” says Zoey. “You got any creamer or anything?”
Clay can’t help but smile. “There’s more of both in the fridge.”
“Thanks. And good luck in there.”
Braedon sits on his bed, arms folded, knees up. He hears a knock on his bedroom door and his father say, “Can I come in?” Braedon wants to freeze out his father but he also wants to have thisconversation. Otherwise he wouldn’t have said what he said in the kitchen.
“I guess,” is all he can manage. He watches the doorknob turn and the door open. Clay enters the room, grabs the chair from Braedon’s desk, and pulls it toward the bed. He sits, takes a breath, and says, “Did you contact her?”
Braedon stares at his feet and shakes his head.
“But you think I’ve known all along where she is and what she’s been up to.”
Braedon stares at his feet and nods his head.
“What makes you think that?”
“Because…” Braedon turns to look at Clay. “You’re smart. If I figured it out, and I’m only twelve, than you must have figured it out a long time ago. But you didn’t tell me, which is a lie by omission. Which means, you’ve been lying to me.”
Clay interlocks his fingers and rests his hands on his lap. “Well, Brae, you’re pretty smart yourself because everything you’re saying is correct.”
Braedon tries not to look surprised. Or happy with himself. He had no proof that his father knew where his mother is and that she has a family. It was a bluff. Emily suggested the tactic and it worked. He’s in no mood to give Emily the credit right now. Right now he’ll take that credit for himself. He shrugs and says, “I know.”
Clay sighs. “You want to hear the truth?”
Braedon nods.
“Do you feel you’re ready for it? You’re old enough?”
Another head nod.
“Okay.” Clay shifts in his chair and says, “When your mothershowed up at my door and handed you to me, I figured she’d return any minute to take you back. When that didn’t happen, I figured it would be the next day. And then the next week. And the next month… I was sure she would change her mind. After a few months of me being wrong, I hired a private investigator to find out more about your mother. She found out your mother’s last name and where she lived. I held on to that information, still thinking she’d contact me and want to be in your life. But she didn’t. When you were five, I went back to the private investigator and asked for an update. That’s when I found out she’s married, living in London, and has two kids.
“My heart broke for you, Brae. But I knew it wasn’t about you. She didn’t even know you. It was about her. Something in her life or personality, I don’t know what because I only knew your mom for about eight hours, but something made it impossible for her to be your mother. Maybe she was too young. Maybe her family disapproved of me. Maybe she didn’t like me. But I can tell you two things. I wanted to make it work, the three of us, being a family. I asked her to stay and give it a go. She declined.
“And the other thing I know is that giving you to me was not easy for her. I saw a profound pain in her eyes. It was like she had pulled out her own heart to give you away. I promise you, Brae, that is the absolute truth.”
Braedon sniffles. “Then why did she do it?”
“I don’t know. But maybe you can ask her someday.” Clay reaches out and puts a hand on Braedon’s shoulder. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. When I first learned the truth, you were too young to understand. You’ve been old enough for a while, but I was so concerned about our move to the States and howyou’d handle it that I didn’t want to add another hard thing for you. And then this past year, you’ve been doing so great, making friends already, plus you and Grandpa Judd getting along the way you do, it’s really a beautiful thing to see… I didn’t want to wreck that by telling you that your mother has another family.”
“But you should have told me,” says Braedon.
“Yeah,” says Clay. “I should have. And I’m very sorry I did not. I made a mistake. I should have known better.”
Braedon loves hearing this but he doesn’t want to show it. He’s learning how to become a man, and not gloating seems like part of the deal. He’s not sure why but he never sees his father or his grandpa Judd gloat. Gloating is for those idiots on TV, whether they’re talking on a news program or in a post-game interview. It’s always better to play it cool, like you expected to win and each victory is just another ho-hum day.
Braedon keeps his arms folded and his jaw tight and says, “Anything else you want to tell me?”
Clay thought this question might be coming and he’s prepared for it. “Yes,” he says. “There is one more thing.”
CHAPTER 38
Braedon can’t hide his surprise. His facade of anger melts away and his curiosity takes over. Curiosity and astonishment that his tactic worked and gratitude for his father’s forthcomingness. “What is it?”
