I slide my pants down, and he stops kissing me and pulls back, away from me.
Oh no. Gods. My stomach flips. I could not have ruined this again. Embarrassment makes me want to curl in a ball. He pulled away again. I should’ve taken things slower, just allowed them to unfold.
I am the court jester of trying to get Royo to bed me.
He sits on his knees, then reaches into the tent. His hand comes out with the other blanket, and he lays it over me. It’s the brown fur one he wrapped around my shoulders after he saved me from drowning.
“What’s this for?” I ask.
“I didn’t want you to get cold.” His face is so pure and thoughtful. My heart flutters. It literally feels like a caged butterfly.
“Come keep me warm, instead.” I push the fur aside. I’m naked except for my camisole, so I take that off, too.
He groans, and his eyes change. Something in him, that last shred of reserve, breaks. We’ve finally kicked off our boots, and he slowly takes down his pants and his underwear.
Worth. The. Wait.
He slides his body over mine, but instead of kissing me he makes a trail down the center of me. Each place his lips hit leaves my skin feeling aflame. It’s nearly the same sensation as when I’m furious—a burning at my core, racing through me, until I feel like I’ll ignite. But this time it’s so pleasant. All the sensation converges between my thighs, molten and waiting.
This isn’t my first time, but it’s my first time wanting someone so desperately. He’s made it down to the pit of my stomach when I start shamelessly begging.
“Please, Royo.” I moan. “Please.”
He smiles, looking up at me. “Please what?”
I groan. Terrible man. He knows exactly what I want.
“I’m going to pass out and explode at the same time,” I say.
Royo laughs and shakes his head. And gods, that smile. “Impatient little thief.”
He shifts my leg, bending it up, then kisses by my knee. I grab at the blanket as his lips tease the delicate skin of my inner thigh. I’m going to pull every piece of fur out of this if I’m not careful. I shake from anticipation, my hips arching, begging.
“You’re ruining me,” I say.
He stares into my eyes. “I’m about to.”
Then his mouth is on me, and I gasp, seeing stars.
Chapter Fifty-Eight
Mikail
City of Vashney, Khitan
Stars, if I have to hear another of Euyn’s conspiracy theories, I’m at risk of losing my own sanity. I opt to take a long walk to the Vashney messenger house, but really, I’m just trying to get away from him.
Because you can love someone and want your own space.
That’s what Gambria said. Although I continue to debate my feelings for Euyn, Gam had distinct thoughts on my relationship with the crown prince. It’s not as simple as she pretends it is, though. She calls him a colonizer and a bloodletter, among other colorful phrases, but he was a child, just as I was, during the Festival of Blood. And holding children responsible for the acts of their elders always leads to atrocity.
Still, she isn’t completely off base about him. He did want to kill the priest in the Temple of Knowledge under the guise of mercy. And then there are his thoughts on the pragmatism of sinking Wei.
I sigh deeply.
When we left the temple, we gave Royo and Aeri a sunsae to meet us in Vashney. It’s a ten-day journey round-trip, and that’sifthey were able to locate the egg immediately. It is now day ten.
A little fear chills me on the snowy walk. Not because I think Aeri and Royo will betray us, but because they might fail. And then what? We couldn’t find Staraheli, and I doubt the Marnans have made it easier to access his body. We are running out of time, and what’s worse is that I still haven’t figured out Joon’s master plan. I keep probing and winding up at loose ends. But perhaps we can get to Quilimar even without an exception to the Rule of Distance. Maybe she will see Gambria—that is why I asked her to accompany us, as my backup plan.
