San Francisco, California
We were supposed to be at the church by ten. I woke up that morning at the San Francisco Hotel, sleeping on a large bed next to Hazel in a second-floor room that Sam and several laborers had enclosed the day before. There were four rooms walled in—one for Father, one for the children, one for Paddy, and one that was meant for Sam and me.
I lay for a moment looking out the window that did not yet have glass, staring at the back of a large wooden building that faced Jackson Street. The sun hadn’t risen, but the darkness was fading. There was a chill to the air, though I was warm under the quilt.
It was a little quieter up on the hill, and the sound of birds could be heard twittering in the distance while the shouts of men from a nearby saloon broke the relative silence. It was comforting to be on the second floor and inside wooden walls, instead of canvas ones. Once the glass was put in place, which would happen after the wedding, the hotel would be fully enclosed.
Hazel was still asleep on her side next to me, her hands clasped under her rosy cheek. She was so young and innocent and deserved the best future I could possibly give her. Motherless, andin a chaotic and dangerous town, she was already facing hardships that other children didn’t have to face. Father was right; it wouldn’t be long before society caught up to San Francisco and the Victorian era would usher in a whole new set of principles and standards. The last thing I wanted to do was saddle Hazel with a questionable name and family.
Protecting our family’s reputation had driven Sam and me to get married, but I wasn’t angry or disappointed. I wanted to be Sam Kendal’s wife, more than I’d ever wanted anything before.
I turned onto my back and stared at the rough boards of the ceiling. Sam had been in such a good mood yesterday, his excitement hardly contained as he worked on the hotel. Every time I was with him, my heart pounded hard with anticipation and happiness—yet, I couldn’t allow myself to fully embrace our wedding plans knowing we had less than a month left together. How much harder would it be to say good-bye to him after we had spent time as man and wife?
My heart cried out to God, not even sure what to pray for. I had never had a normal existence and knew that my twenty-fifth birthday would be the hardest day of my life, but nothing had prepared me for this. I tried to keep busy to forget what was coming, but it was getting harder to ignore my reality. I wanted to hope and believe that I could have everything my heart desired, but I knew I would have to sacrifice something. I just wasn’t sure what it would be yet.
Add to that my disappointment about the gold and how Spencer had tricked me into going to the Beverly Wilshire Hotel, and my heart was heavier than it should be on my wedding day. The only good that had come from it was that my feelings for Spencer were no longer complicated. I cared about him and wished him well, but I had no desire to see him again.
Today was about Sam. I wanted to make it as special as I could for him, and that meant leaving all my troubles behind, at least for today.
Stepping out of the large bed that had been built inside the room, I felt like a new woman. The night before, I’d enjoyed a hipbath and washed my hair for the first time in weeks. Now I put on my nicest dress, which I had taken out of my trunk the night before and hung up to let the wrinkles out.
I spent a little extra time getting ready and looked at my reflection in a large mirror that Sam had somehow procured for me. I didn’t even want to know how much money he had paid for it, since almost every luxury cost an astronomical fee in San Francisco. But it was nice to have, and I wouldn’t deny him his pleasure in giving it to me.
When I left the room, Sam was just exiting the bedroom that would become ours tonight. He and Johnnie had slept there the past two nights, but Johnnie would move into Hazel’s room once we were married.
It was dim in the upstairs hallway, though there was enough light for me to see the smile on Sam’s handsome face.
“Good morning,” he said as he gently closed the bedroom door behind him.
My pulse picked up speed, and butterflies filled my stomach at the sight of him. It wasn’t just his good looks or kindness that drew me to him. He was intelligent and strong and more loyal than any other person I’d ever met. I had not spent a lot of time dreaming about the man I might marry someday because I had never been certain of which path I would choose. But if I had dreamed, Sam would have been the man that filled my heart with hope.
“Good morning.” I also closed my door, then met him in the middle of the hall.
He took one of my hands and kissed it. “Do you know what my first thought was this morning?”
Shaking my head, I searched his gaze, loving the way he looked at me.
“You.”
I smiled.
“And the fact that tomorrow,” he said, drawing me into his arms, “when I wake up, you’ll be lying next to me.”
He kissed me then, and everything inside of me melted as I clung to him.
“I don’t want this to ever end, Ally,” he whispered as he moved his kisses to my neck. “Why would God allow us to fall in love and not let us have more time?”
My heart ached at the longing in his voice. Was it right to give him hope? I hadn’t wanted to disappoint him more, but I couldn’t bear to hear his pain.
“There might be a way.”
He immediately stopped kissing me and pulled back. “How?”
“Let’s go downstairs, where we can have a little privacy.”
Taking my hand, he led me down the wide staircase and into the room that would become the front hall of the hotel. It was a little cooler on the main floor, so we went into the kitchen.
“I’ll start a fire,” he said, “and then we can talk.”
