“I have no illusions of your true feelings,” he said, coming closer to her as he lowered his fingers. “But it does my heart good to think you care about my welfare.”
“Your welfare is very important to me,” she said just above a whisper. “Why would it not be?”
William’s gaze lowered to her lips and her chest began to rise and fall in an unsteady rhythm. As her fiancé, he had every right to a kiss—yet her heart would not be in it. At least, not now, not with Arran so close and the memory of their embrace the day before still so fresh in her mind. She did not want to spend the rest of her life comparing the two men, because she feared William would never measure up and that would not be fair to him.
Her shoulders stiffened and she pulled back, only slightly. It was enough for William to return his gaze to hers. She could only imagine that he and Anne had felt passionate about each other, and that he would desire the same ardor in his second marriage. Guilt washed over her, knowing she could not offer him what he wanted.
“Will you make me a promise?” he asked.
She nodded, unable to find her voice.
“If something does happen to me, will you keep Miriam and raise her as your own?”
“Do not say such things.” Panic filled her chest. “Nothing can happen to you.” She couldn’t even imagine the great loss his death would create. Not only was he zealous about sharing his faith, but he was more knowledgeable than anyone she’d ever met.
“I will do everything in my power to come back to you and Miriam.” He smiled again. “I am very eager to make you my wife and start fresh in England.”
She wished she could share his sentiments, but it would not be honest. Instead, she returned his smile. She might not be eager to return to England and begin a life with a man she did not share romantic feelings for, but she was very grateful for the opportunity and for becoming Miriam’s mother, in every sense of the word.
“Good night, Eleanor,” he said. “I will pray God’s protection on all of us.”
He began to move past her, but then he stopped. Very gently, he leaned over and placed a kiss on her cheek.
She closed her eyes briefly, overcome by his tenderness.
“Good night,” she whispered.
He left her then, her heart beating an unknown tune—foreign yet hopeful.
Chapter Fourteen
It was almost suppertime as Arran paced, waiting for the blacksmith, Michael Heden, to replace Tiberius’s shoe. Earlier that day, Arran had ridden his horse to Colony Gardens to tell the settlers who had chosen to return to their homes to come to the fort, and a nail had come through Tiberius’s hoof. Some of the settlers had listened to Arran’s warning, but others had been stubborn and refused to leave.
The entire fort had been on high alert all day. At any moment, Arran expected the call to come from the watchtower. He just hoped Tiberius would be ready.
“Mayhap the Cree were wrong,” James said to Arran as he leaned against the wall of the blacksmith shop, chewing on a piece of straw.
“They could have been sent as a false warning,” Archie Currie added, spitting out a toothpick he’d been gnawing on. “Fear is a powerful weapon. Mayhap they thought the settlers would be easier to control if they had a couple days of fear to wear on them.”
“They’re coming,” Arran said, certain the Cree were not wrong. “But anything could have happened to put them off by a day or more.”
“I hope they all drowned.” Archie crossed his arms. “Serve them right.”
“I would feel better if the settlers would come into the fort tonight.” Arran had tried several times to convince them it was foolish to stay in Colony Gardens, but they were a stubborn lot.
Inside the smithy, the sound of a hammer beat a steady tune. Overhead, the sky was bright blue, with nary a cloud in sight. The air was warm but not stifling. It would be a perfect evening to sleep under the stars, if they had not been in danger.
With little else to do but wait, West and Semple had spent most of the day inside the governor’s house. Arran had no desire to spend more time with Eleanor than necessary, so he had stayed outside. He wasn’t sure if he would join them for supper, not only because he had no appetite, but because it was torture to see Eleanor and West together.
The hammering in the smithy subsided and a couple moments later, Heden led Tiberius out by his reins.
“Thank you,” Arran said to Heden. “He looks—”
“Riders approaching!” A shout came from the southwestern watchtower. Ben, the boy who often helped in the barns, had volunteered to watch the prairie during the day shift. He pointed there now. “Riders approaching!”
Arran’s heartrate escalated. “Archie, tell Semple to join us immediately.”
“Aye.”
