“You mean to say you will attend the events that are themost advantageous for you and your son.” She clasped her hands together. “I’ve been compiling a list. I’ll tell you which ones to prepare for.”
The staff had gone their separate ways, and it was just Mother, Father, Teddy, and me in the front hall. The moment had come, though this might not be the ideal place to broach the subject. How did I convey a lifetime of hurt? How did I tell her what she had done to me in one short conversation?
“Your list won’t be necessary.” I lifted my chin and addressed her directly so she wouldn’t misunderstand me. “From this moment on, I will be the one in control of our future.” I licked my dry lips and forced myself to continue. “You spent my entire life dictating my every move, never once asking me what I wanted, but that will now stop.”
She stared at me but did not make a move to respond.
I looked at Father, and he gave me an almost indiscernible nod to continue.
“I don’t know if we will ever move beyond the past,” I said to her, “but I would like to try. For your grandson’s sake, if not ours. The best way to start is for you to realize you do not control my life any longer.”
She did not say a word, but her jaw tightened, and I knew my words had upset her. How could they not, after so long in control?
“If you want to be a part of our lives,” I continued, “then you must let me do what I think is best for Teddy and me.”
It was her turn to lift her chin. “Everything I did, I did for your happiness and promotion, Elizabeth. I never once intended to hurt you or cause you pain. If I did, then I’m sorry.”
My mouth slipped open as I studied her. She had never apologized to me before. And though she did not take responsibility for her actions, she had conceded that she might have caused me pain.
It was a start.
NEW YORK CITY
JUNE 30, 1916
“You must relax,” Mother said as I fidgeted in the automobile next to her and Father.
“I’ve never left him alone before.”
“He’ll be fine. Edith is like a second mother to him.”
I sighed. Mother was right. It had been almost two weeks since we’d returned to New York, and this was the first night I’d agreed to attend a social function with Mother and Father, a dinner party at the home of John and Abby Rockefeller. I’d never left Teddy in anyone else’s care for longer than an hour or two and had never left him to travel to another location. Not that the Rockefellers’ home on West Fifty-Fourth Street was terribly far. Less than seven city blocks separated us, but it felt like an ocean.
“You need to enjoy yourself,” Mother said to me. “You’re much too attached to that child. It’s not healthy for either of you. You’ll need to secure a governess as soon as possible. But first and foremost, you must start to look for your next husband.”
I readjusted my long white gloves. My diamond bracelet caught on the fabric, and I had to disentangle it. “Remember, Mother, I am in charge of my own future, and I have no wish to marry again.”
“Nonsense. Every woman wishes to be married.”
I shook my head. “Every woman wishes to be loved, but that doesn’t necessarily mean she wishes to be married.”
“You and your newfangled ideas.” She harrumphed. “You’ve let your freedom go to your head. Don’t you want a home and a family?”
“I have a family,” I said. “And someday soon, I’ll have a home.”
“Don’t you want companionship?”
It was Father’s turn to harrumph, and I smiled.
“I long to be loved, Mother.” I laid my hands in my lap as the driver pulled up to the most impressive mansion in New York City. The Rockefellers had finished it three years ago and had spared no expense. It was enormous and beautiful.
“You must always be thinking of your social status, Elizabeth.”
“I’m the Marchioness of Cumberland,” I responded. “What more could I want where social status is concerned?”
“You exasperate me to no end.”
I laughed, enjoying this newfound banter with my mother. Over the past two weeks our relationship had started to shift. When she reverted back to her old ways, I simply reminded her that she no longer had the power to control my destiny. She still tried, but it was easier to foil her attempts.
