He likes marshmallows better, I thought.And then he sprinkles bits of graham cracker on top. “A winter s’more,” he calls it. He invented it in my kitchen when we were nine.
Did he tell you that, Emma?
“Sage?” Luke asked.
“No.” I shook my head. “No, let’s stay. I’m fine.” A lump formed in my throat. “I have to be fine.”
“Okay,” Luke said, but spoke again when I uncapped my highlighter. “You know I’m here,” he whispered. “I’m always here if you can’t be.”
I nodded and forced myself to continue my chapter, but it was impossible to fully focus. Every couple of seconds my gaze would stray to Nick, sipping his hot chocolate with his new girlfriend at the front window’s tiny table.Does he feel it?I wondered.Does he feel me here?
Our booth was so big that neither of them had so much as glanced in our direction. But a minute later, when Emma excused herself to grab some napkins, I literally jolted to my feet. “I’m going to say hey to Nick,” I announced, my voice a squeak. It was like a magnet was pulling me to him.
Luke’s look was shaky, but he gave me a thumbs-up.
So I crossed the café, Nick’s and my eyes locking after I almost tripped over a random chair. “Hi,” I said, trying to play things cool. My pulse pounded. “How’s the hot chocolate?”
“Oh, hey,” he replied. “Pretty good.” He studied his mug. “It could be thicker, but good overall.”
I felt a flutter of confidence. Nick always said the best hot chocolate was thick and creamy, like liquid velvet. “No marshmallows, though,” I commented.
Nick ignored that. “What’re you doing here?” he asked.
“Homework,” I said. “Luke and I like to study here…” I gestured to our booth, where the only sign of Luke was the brim of his baseball cap. “Anyway…” I plastered on a smile. “I wondered if you wanted to go for a grind tomorrow? Take Ace and Stinger to one of the cross-country trails?”
Say yes, I thought, awkwardly shifting from one foot to the other.Say yes, so I know we’re still something, that there’ssomethingbetween us.
But Nick shook his head. “Sorry,” he said as I heard theclick-clackof boots behind me. “Emma and I are going—”
“Hey, Sage!” Emma said brightly, my stomach knotting when I turned to see her ever-present smile. She reached to touch my white knitted scarf. “I love this!”
“Thanks.” I tried to smile back. “My mom made it.”
“It’s really cute,” she said, then slipped past me to rejoin Nick at their table. I watched her kiss his cheek before snuggling into his side. The corners of my eyes began to sting.
Leave,I thought, but the connection between my mind and legs had been severed.
Nick coughed. “Another time, Sage?” he asked. “Maybe?”
“Okay, yeah.” I nodded, blinking tears away. “Maybe another time.”
Like the mind reader he was, Luke had our backpacks ready to go by the time I made it back to our booth. We wordlessly shrugged them on, then escaped into the night. Neither of us spoke until we stopped at the end of the block, waiting to cross the street. Luke pulled me into his arms, and I cried into his shoulder.
Charlie suggested we go to the movies on Saturday. “Just us?” I asked, and was met with a beat of hesitation.
“Well, no,” he said. “Luke too.”
I nodded. “Sure, of course. What’re we seeing?”
Now, we stood in the lobby waiting for Luke.Meet you there,he’d texted us.I’m carrying the team on this group project and can’t leave. It’ll go to shit.
“I never noticed it before,” I said, “but Luke’s kinda cocky.”
Charlie gave me a look. “You’re just figuring that out?” He smiled to himself. “I love it.”
I rolled my eyes. “You would.”
Grinning, he shrugged, and then we fell into a comfortable silence. I started thinking about Emma stopping by our table at dinner tonight, annoyingly nice as always. “No concussion?” she asked Charlie.
