“Je ne sais quoi?” Madame Hoffman suggested.
“Merci, Madame,” she said. “I understand there is a certain je ne sais quoi about illicit affairs on campus, especially when under the stars, but we have curfews for countless reasons.” She paused. “Students’ safety being one of them.”
“I understand,” I said, feeling a tight twinge in my chest. “But I didn’t leave him—Ineverwould’ve left him.”
“And I believe that’s extremely admirable,” Dean DeLuca replied. “From what Roger Harvey wrote, you had the chance to save yourself, yet you didn’t.” His voice softened. “I’m not sure I can say the same for some students.”
“Saving myself never even crossed my mind,” I said, sitting up straighter in my chair. “I wasn’t raised to abandon anyone.”I reached for my mom’s hand but made sure to meet everyone’s eyes. “Our Ames family has taught me so much over the years, and the importance of always looking out for one another is one of them.” I took a breath. “I’m sorry for sneaking out, Headmaster Bickford, but I’m not sorry for staying with him.”
I could hear the blood pulsing in my ears, but otherwise it was crickets as Headmaster Bickford exchanged a look with Dean DeLuca. “Lily, darling,” she said afterward, “would you please leave us for a few minutes? We have a lot to discuss.” She gave me a thin smile. “Why don’t you get something to drink?”
“Oh, okay,” I said, rising from my chair. “Of course.”
She’s going to give me a strike, I thought as I chose a seltzer from the marble-countertop kitchenette’s stocked refrigerator. My fingers trembled a little when I popped the can’s tab and took a long sip.How could she not?
I began pacing around the kitchenette and telling myself it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Alex had a strike but had still gotten into Columbia back in December. Maybe Georgetown wouldn’t care when they saw mine marked on my final transcript. I was a kid, and kids messed up sometimes. This wasn’t even that major a mess-up. They had to understand.
“Lil?”
I turned to see my mom standing in the doorway, her face unreadable. “How bad is it?” I hiccuped.
Too much sparkling water too quickly.
My mom leaned against the doorframe. “We need to haveour bags packed by the end of the school day,” she said. “If we haven’t vacated campus by five, Campo has the right to remove us using plenty of profanity.” She sighed. “We’ll fly to Montana, and after throwing the rest of our house in a dumpster, Josh will join us. Penny hinted that the three of us should all change our names—”
I laughed so hard that seltzer spewed out my nose. “Seriously, Mom?”
“Yeah, seriously, Lily.” She nodded at the office. “Get the hell back in there.”
My stomach was churning like the high seas by the time I returned to the hot seat, and I couldn’t decide whether to vomit in my lap and risk ruining the chair’s pure white fabric or vomit right onto the blue-and-white chinoiserie rug, sending it to a landfill.
Deliberation was suspended when I heard my name. “Lily, you’ve had an exemplary record,” Headmaster Bickford said. “You are one of the most promising young women Ames has seen in a long time, both inside the classroom and outside the classroom.” She smiled tenderly. “Except for this hiccup.”
As if on cue, I actually hiccuped.
“There’s only a week left in school,” she continued smoothly, “so we arenotgoing to give you a strike—”
“Oh, thank you!” I exclaimed. “Thank you so, so much.”
“—but youwillbe disciplined,” she finished.
My pulse quickened. Disciplined? What did that mean? Because my mom’s comforting hand on my shoulder suggested that it was a bigger deal than Saturday night detention.
“First, you will serve detention tomorrow night,” Dean DeLuca said. “7:00 to 10:00 in the science center’s lecture hall.”
I nodded, bracing myself for more.
“Second, you are no longer allowed to attend the senior prom next week.”
“Oh,” I said, accidentally aloud. “Oh, okay—wow.”
Headmaster Bickford opened her mouth to elaborate, but I didn’t truly listen. The senior prom—I couldn’t attend the senior prom, a night that I had built up over the years to rival Cinderella’s ball. My beautiful soft blue gown was now destined to stay in my closet; I wouldn’t be getting my hair and makeup done with Zoe and Pravika, and—shit.
Shit.
I had to tell Daniel I couldn’t be his date. Later today, I would have to look into his eyes and say that I’d screwed up and couldn’t go. The idea was worse than pulling a prank on him because it involvedspeakingto him. Based on what Tag had told me last night, I hadn’t planned on talking to him ever again.
“And finally,” Dean DeLuca said, “we are stripping you of your senior dinner privilege and thus your salutatorian duties.”
