“What areyoudressing up as for Halloween?” Taylor finally asked after sitting there for a few moments in sullen silence.
“Honestly? No idea.” I hadn’t even thought about it. And it’s not like I had any money to spend on a costume or time to make one. I’d have to improvise. “Honestly, the way things have been going, I’m not sure if Aaron’s party is even a good idea for me. I don’t really want to show up just to give everyone a chance to glare at me like I’m some sort of witch.”
“You know what?” he responded suddenly, looking convinced. “Screw Aaron’s party. We’ll see who can really draw the people in. I’ll throw a party at my house, and people won’t dare give you dirty looks. I think I’ve made it clear at this point: Anyone who messes with you messes with me.”
I smiled and pulled him toward me, tugging at his shirt.
“You’re doing it again,” I said, brushing his lips with mine. “I know how to take care of myself.”
I don’t think he heard my words before he started kissing me. Taylor was a good kisser: he knew how to bring me to my knees and make me feel like no one could ever hurt me as long as I was in his arms. He was the kind of guy who would take a bullet forthe people he cared about. And dammit…that was going to be his downfall.
***
My training shift at Mill’s was a success. I mean, it wasn’t a secret to anyone that cakes and cookies were kind of my thing. I’d won competitions at the county fair, and my cakes were always the first to sell out, and that fact convinced Mrs. Mill. I could wait tables and cash people out at the counter, and I was more than happy to bake anything she asked.
“Now if you see a bunch of kids come in here to drink nothing but water or split one coffee between them, as if this were some sort of library, you let me know,” she said. “I’ll go over and start lecturing them about the war. You just watch how they scamper off like scared little lizards. Teenagers today, they don’t give a damn about anything but TikTak and Pinstagram.”
It cracked me up that she couldn’t remember what TikTok was called and that she thought Instagram and Pinterest were the same thing, but now I knew her secret weapon. I had done the very thing she was complaining about. This was a business, after all, and plenty of times we’d come in just to study and read, it was so comfortable in there.
Combining school and work ended up being easier than I’d thought. If it was a slow night, Mrs. Mill would let me study behind the counter. One downside was having to serve my own classmates. They couldn’t believe that the former queen of the school, who had always had money and used to take European vacations every summer, was now slinging coffee. I heard their remarks, and I tried to ignore their laughter when I had my back turned.
My mother hated seeing her daughter work inthat dump, as she called it. She had lied to her friends at the club, telling them the job would look good on my application to Yale. It wasstupid—anyone who didn’t live under a rock had heard about our financial problems by now. Mom had lost her power. And she wasn’t handling it well.
On Friday afternoon, Julian came in and took a table in the corner. We looked at each other warily, and when I walked over to ask if I could get him anything, he asked me to sit down. I looked over at Mrs. Mill, noticed there was no one in line, and decided to join him for a moment.
“I’m sorry, Kam,” he said, calling me by the nickname only Thiago used for me. “I know it wasn’t you. I know you’d never do something like that. But when I saw that word on my locker, I couldn’t think. I just reacted.”
“It’s fine. I understand. I really do,” I said, pleased to see he no longer blamed me.
“It wasn’t right. I was a bad friend. I have been for weeks now,” he said, taking my hand. “I know things haven’t been easy for you. You pulled away from me and everyone else, and I thought you didn’t want to be my friend anymore.”
“Of course I still want to be your friend, Julian! But what you’re saying is true. I did pull away. And I think now they see me as weak.”
“People might think you’re a nobody now that your little gang’s rejected you,” he responded indignantly. “But they’re wrong.”
“That little gang was all my friends. And they won’t even speak to me.”
“They weren’t your friends then. They have no idea about the kind of person you are, Kam. Youarethe queen of the school, you always will be, and people will realize that whether they want to or not.”
I shook my head and let go of his hands. “That doesn’t matter to me anymore,” I said, fiddling with the dish towel in my hand. “It’s true that I don’t like the way they’re all looking at me, andI don’t like being accused of things I didn’t do, but I never liked being the center of attention. Now that I’m not, I can just be me, you know?”
“Kam, if you’re going out with Taylor Di Bianco, youarethe center of attention.”
I shrugged. “I can’t help it. He’s my boyfriend. If people don’t like it, fuck them.” This was the first time I’d publicly acknowledged my relationship with Taylor.
“Well, well, well,” he said, and his eyes got wider. “You’ve finally confirmed it. Now I want all the dirty details. What’s his package like?”
I was blushing, since I had no idea what the answer was.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t done it!” Julian exclaimed.
I shook my head, uncomfortable. Julian was going too far. That was private; it was between me and Taylor and no one else. “Not yet.”
He shook his head. “What are you waiting for? He’s hot.”
“I don’t know,” I said. “We just haven’t had the chance.”
“But do you want to?”
