I snort and the very cool, hot girl passing by me looks at me like I’m contagious. “I’ll let you get back to work,” I say more quietly. “Nothing to report here.”
“Okay, all right,” she tells me. “I get it. You got college-girl shit to do, but I just wanted to—we didn’t really talk about this before you left, but you know Benny is at Wexley, right?”
“Oh.” Uh, yeah, if she only knew he was living in my dorm.
“I don’t want you to be caught off guard is all.”
I want to tell her. She would be upset… confused, even. I don’t think she would be mad. But this will all be in the past the moment the semester is over. “Thanks.”
We say our goodbyes and by the time I hang up, I’m nearly back to Haystack.
Even though Bennett sort of trapped me into going to the dorm orientation, I am a little bit excited. However, as I walk into the common room, I truly regret cornering Bennett into showing up because my brain conveniently forgot that we would be forced to keep this charade going in front of the entire floor. But I hold out hope that he will flake.
As promised, Daisy collects me from my room a few minutes before, and Briar drags her body behind us.
In the common room, there are three seats left: two together and one by itself. It feels weird to split up the two roommates, so I head off to sit by myself next to a crowd who are all dressed likeAdam Sandler and reek of weed. The room is filled with mismatched couches, a few random armchairs, and old wooden folding chairs that look like they survived World War II.
On the walls are things like Wexley felt pennants, informational posters, and a few framed photos of the school mascot over the years, the fighting bear. Directly above the older television—in a place of pride—is one piece of sketch paper tacked to the wall, edges curling, with an impressively hand-drawn and very muscular bear withhugeballs. School spirit, it would seem, is alive and well.
Dylan the RA walks in looking like a brooding snack. He hops up on the counter and just waits for people to shut the hell up with this bored expression on his face. He’s the kind of guy who can do that. Like when a teacher feels a class is getting rowdy and they stand at the front of the room with their arms crossed until each student one by one realizes they’re all in trouble.
A hush rolls through the crowd, except for the guy behind me who is quoting lines from some old Will Ferrell movie. Someone swats the back of his head just as Bennett jogs in, his hair a little damp, wearing workout shorts and a black T-shirt with the sleeves cut off.
Every girl on the floor plus a few guys are practically drooling as he flashes a dimpled smile and a shy wave. Shy, my ass.
They’re all crestfallen as he strolls across the circle to me and plants a kiss on my cheek.
The absolute rage I feel at the innocent touch burns. He’s technically doing me a favor. At the cost of my pride, sure. But I still have to remind myself.He is doing me a favor. He is doing me a favor.
“We’re all out of chairs,” Dylan says. “You’ll have to take the floor or stand against the wall.”
“Sorry about that,” I tell him with a sweet smile.
“You could always sit on my lap,” he says with a wink beforewalking past me, his fingers grazing my shoulder before he posts up behind me. I can feel the heat of him at my back, but I refuse to turn around.
Dylan rolls his neck one way and then the other, making an audible crack. “All right, so let’s make this quick. This is your common room. Keyword iscommon. Don’t be a dick and make a mess of a space you have to share with sixty other people. As you can see, we have tables and couches. Kitchens are located on the first, fourth, and eighth floors. Please don’t be the person who burns a bag of popcorn. The bulletin board on the far wall has info on student resources including the student health center, which generously provides us with a tub of unlimited condoms. You will find those on the counter behind me. Do not steal all the condoms at once. You are not having that much sex.”
That gets a laugh out of everyone.
“Unless you’re the newlyweds,” calls some guy on the other side of the circle.
The room breaks into chatter. Many people already seem to know who we are, while others are surprised to hear that there’s a married couple on the floor.
I sink into my chair a little and wish that I could melt into a puddle and slip through the cracks of the walnut-colored hardwood floor.
Bennett squeezes my shoulder. “Says the sad fuck who isn’t getting laid.”
There are a fewooooohs, and Dylan’s baritone carries over the noise. “The Wexley dorms have a no-drug-and-alcohol policy. Based on the whiff I just got, someone is already breaking that rule.” He shakes his head. “Listen, just smoke your weed anywhere but here. Laundry is in the basement. It’s not haunted. It’s just old. If you feel unsafe for any reason, unless you think the laundry room is haunted,my number is on the emergency evacuation instructions on the back of your door. I’m also in the room at the far end of the hallway with the hand-drawn mer-cat taped to the door.”
Briar snorts. “So we should just look for the door with the wet pussy?”
Daisy rolls her eyes at her roommate’s crass comment.
Dylan’s expression becomes nearly deadly. “I’m sorry. Was that a joke?” he asks. “I don’t do jokes.”
“Fucking A,” someone mutters, and Briar flips Dylan off when he turns away.
“All right, let’s get this icebreaker over with so we can all get back to our lives,” Dylan says.
