“Are you sure Gretchen and Pearl are coming?” I asked. “Maybe the Hope Channel is going to send in some kind of assassin to finish us off and destroy any evidence ofDuke the Halls.”
He leaned back, tilting his head against the velvet sofa. “I think I might prefer that at this point.” His phone buzzed and he looked down, reading a message that made him both grimace and smile. I decided it was better not to know. “I guess I could refinance my condo. For the third time. That might pay for a semester of art school and one run of carbon-neutral nipple clamps.”
The door swung open, and Gretchen and Pearl shuffled inwith very expensive, minimalist carry-on luggage. Gretchen wore a sleek down jacket and Pearl a shaggy faux-fur coat.
“Oh, good, you’re both here,” Gretchen said, her voice neutral.
“Two birds. One stone,” Teddy muttered.
My heart jackhammered in my chest. I would do anything for this moment to be over. I stood up abruptly before either of them could even take off their coats and sunglasses and let the word vomit tumble out of my mouth. “I’m so sorry for lying to you both, and I completely understand whatever it is you have to do. And working with you both was such an honor, and I’m sorry I ruined basically everything.” I groaned. “I’m just, like, endlessly sorry.”
Teddy cleared his throat. “An emphatic ditto.”
Gretchen marched directly to me and placed her hands on my shoulders, and I had to force myself not to flinch. I liked and admired her so, so much, and while there were many awful things about the last seventy-two hours, disappointing her felt even worse than I could have imagined.
She opened her mouth to speak, but then Pearl crushed her body into mine with an intense hug. “Oh, Bee, how are you holding up? I can feel the chaotic energy vibrating off you. You must be dying for a sound bath.”
Gretchen tugged Pearl’s hand, pulling her back. “Are you okay, Bee? The internet can be a violent place, especially for women.”
I blinked at the two of them, Pearl curled under Gretchen’s arm. Why weren’t they yelling at me or making disappointed faces and noises? “W-wait. Neither of you are mad?”
Behind them, Teddy stood up, and I could see the wheels of his brain spinning behind those bushy eyebrows.
Gretchen raised one eyebrow. “At you? No.” She looked over her shoulder to Teddy. “This guy’s another story.”
Teddy shrugged as if to sayfair enough.
“Let me get this right,” I said as I sank back down onto the love seat. “You know I’m a porn star and you’re okay with that? Just to be clear, a lot of my stuff isn’t like Cinemax soft-core. It’s like... porn-porn. Like, OB-GYN-exam levels of pornographic.”
Gretchen thought for a moment as Pearl plopped down into the armchair next to the fireplace and pulled her knees tight to her chest.
“Yeah,” Gretchen finally said. “I mean it would have been nice to know that from the beginning, but, Bee, there’s nothing bad or shameful about sex work. The only difference between you and most of Hollywood is that they sell the lie of sex and you’re selling the real thing.”
“This is actually kind of perfect,” Pearl said, as if somewhere in the deep recesses of her subconscious she had planned for this exact scenario. “I mean, I know it’s totally beyond the Hope Channel execs’ comprehension levels, butDuke the Halls—at its core—is about sexual transactions and the disproportionate toll they take on women. So this is sort of perfect, actually. It’s the exact social commentary my script needed.”
Teddy tilted his head to the side like a confused puppy, and Gretchen and I shared a look. Oh, Pearl. Sweet Pearl.
“Yeah,” I said very seriously. “Yeah, I really connected with that aspect of the script.”
Pearl shook her finger in the air. “See, Gretch. You knew just from her headshot that she was the perfect fit.”
Gretchen sat down in the other armchair, and her brow furrowed for a moment. “You know, this is probably on me for not thinking the topless headshot was a little off.” She shook the thought from her head and turned to me. “Look, Bee, you need to know that Pearl and I stand with you.” She looked at Teddy. “And with you too, Teddy. But just so we’re clear: I don’t appreciate being lied to.”
“I’m sorry,” he said sincerely. “And Bee and I are going to be fine, okay? You two do what you need to do.”
She smiled at him, like she’d only now begun to uncover the endearing part of Teddy Ray Fletcher that I’d come to know and love over the last few years. “That’s very heroic of you, but I’ve already spoken with the execs. They’re undecided on what they’re going to do with the film, but one thing is for certain: it makes the most financial sense for us to finish the movie. There are only a few days of filming left, so we’re past the point of no return. It’s better for them to have a finished movie on the shelf to air at midnight ten years from now than for them to pull the plug given that the last two days of filming have basically already been paid for.”
Finish the movie? There was no point! “What?” I asked, stunned. “You can’t be serious. They can’t actually be considering releasing this thing?”
Gretchen leaned back and crossed her legs, the toe of her heavy combat boot dangling a few inches above the floor. “Bee,I’ll be honest. I’m really fucking pissed. I’m pissed at the execs for not immediately standing behind you and for making us all their damn puppets. Their whole brand is the magic of Christmas, and everyone deserves that magic. Not just white Christian people who make their kids dress as Bible characters for Halloween. So, yeah, I’m pissed that they want us to finish this thing just to shelve it for eternity, and if you say no, I’m calling this thing. Time of death: right fucking now.”
I looked across the room to Teddy. I was already in violation of the morality clause of my contract. Who knew if they were even going to pay me? Or if they might even consider suing me?
I wanted to play nice with them, but I also felt reckless, like I had nothing to lose.
“It’s your call, kid,” he said.
I shook my head. “I don’t know.”
