She mimes zipping her lips together.
“Or maybe he just has abnormally small feet!” says Amanda as she fishes around a bag of gummy bears for her favorite flavor, pineapple.
“And like Amanda said, why would you make up that story about... passing gas?” I ask, preferring the more polite phrasing. “But maybe it’s a red herring!”
Willowdean bounces a little, her eyebrows skipping up and down.
“Okay, okay,” says Ellen. “Time’s up.”
Amanda licks her lips. “Uhhh... hmmm. Okay, the period at your twelfth birthday party is a lie!”
“I’m gonna say the gastrointestinal incident,” I say after a moment of deliberation.
“I think... ,” says Hannah. “I think... I agree with Millie.”
“So which is it?” I ask.
“Her period is the lie!” shouts Will. And then she gasps. “Oh my God. I forgot your parents are asleep.”
“It’s okay,” I say, knowing that really my mom is probably lying wide awake in bed, thinking of all the ways Hannah and Willowdean might be corrupting me.
Ellen swats at Willowdean’s arm. “I can’t believe you remembered. I got my period at mythirteenthbirthday party. Not my twelfth!”
“Oh, come on!” says Amanda. “That’s a technicality!”
Hannah holds up a finger. “So wait. This means you farted on your boyfriend after doing the nasty?”
Secondary mortification turning to molasses in my chest. “What did you say?”
“Uh, yeah,” says Willowdean. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me this!”
Ellen shrugs. “I pretended to be asleep. And hey, if he wants allllllll ofthis”—she motions to her body. “Then he can’t pick and choose what he gets. People fart! Girls fart!”
Amanda holds out her fist for Ellen to bump. “Respect. Is it weird that I was hoping the fart was the truth?”
Ellen laughs. “Only if you’re weirded out that ithappened, I guess?”
“Why are bodies so weird and gross?” asks Willowdean. “Like, just the phrasebody fluidsshould be illegal. Right up there withmoist.”
Ellen leans her head on Willowdean’s shoulder. “You just have a weird complex right now because... well, you know...”
“You know what?” asks Amanda.
Willowdean holds her hands over her face. “Bo and I have started talking about doing it.”
“And what exactly do you mean by ‘it’?” asks Amanda. “I mean, if you’re gonna do it, at least be able to say it.”
“Sex! Okay?” says Willowdean. “We’re talking about maybe-probably-sooner-than-later having sex, but, like, there are just so many awkward things to think about. And I’m not even talking about him seeing me naked, because, well, we’ve nearly gotten that far.” She sighs. “Isn’t it someone else’s turn?”
I try to pull myself together. But I know my cheeks are beet red. Sex. Wow. I just... the thought of being naked in front of someone else. I want to be ready for that one day, but that day is not today. “Okay,” I say. “Amanda’s up next.”
Amanda wiggles on her rear end. “I don’t know if I’m interesting enough for this game.”
“Everyone’s got dirt,” says El.
Amanda nods into her chest, and I think it’s the most serious I’ve ever seen her. “Okay. One, I pulled the fire alarm in middle school to sabotage a pop quiz in EarthScience and blamed it on Patrick Thomas. And I never got caught.”
“Oh my God,” says Willowdean. “Please let that be true.”
