Eric rolls the bottle in his hand. “Aiai. That’s the first Hua woman.”
“Yes, the one who worked for Empress Wu.”
“Okay, Lucy.” He puts it down on the table and crosses his arms. “Get to the point. I have to take Owen to soccer soon.”
“It’s a moli scent, but not strong. It will help you discover your heart’s desire, but it won’t deposit it in your lap like it would at full strength. You still have to work for it, but at least you’ll know what it is instead of only assuming you know what you want and going down a false path.”
Kelsey looks skeptical, but Eric frowns. “The fifth daughter’s power is true love.”
“I don’t think it is,” I say. “It’s just that in the past, some womencouldn’t see a way to get their heart’s desires except through men, and they were dissuaded from thinking they wanted anything besides children and marriage.”
On my sister-in-law’s face is a dawning understanding, but Eric shakes his head. “That’s bullshit,” he says. “Women weren’t the only people who bought those perfumes.”
“No,” I agree. “The same goes for men. They want love, too, and they want children and marriage.”
He looks frustrated. “You just said no one wanted true love.”
“She’s not saying that love was never someone’s greatest desire,” Kelsey says. “It probably was, for a lot of people. I bet a lot of the men who could afford those perfumes were men who had other opportunities to get what they wanted in life. Love was the last thing they had left to acquire.”
“Why are you giving this to us?” asks Eric.
“In case you wanted some help in getting your dreams,” I say. “Not a lot. It’s more like starting you on the path than anything else.” I don’t want to oversell the impact. “I can make you a full-strength one as well.”
He and Kelsey stare at the little bottle standing on the counter. Eric frowns. “Did Mom smell this before she decided to leave Dad?”
“No. You know why she’s leaving.” Eric lived the same childhood as I did.
He’s quiet for a second. “Yeah. It’s just…” His voice trails off and Kelsey hesitates, then touches his hand.
“Hard.” I finish his sentence. We might be adults, but a fracture like this is destabilizing at any age.
“I know it’s for the best,” he says.
“They should have done it years ago.” We look across the counter at each other. Is he wondering the same thing as me? Whether our relationship would be different if theirs had been?
In the front room, Sophie and Owen are playing a game togetherwith excited yells, the same way we used to when we were kids. My brother and Kelsey look over to the noise, and I look at them. There are heavy bags under Kelsey’s eyes and her face is bloated and pale, while Eric’s sparse stubble doesn’t cover the jowls that are coming with age and good eating. His hair reveals a new bald spot on his crown. What do they want? How many of us can even recognize what we desire most?
Kelsey takes the bottle from Eric, then glances up as hysterical laughter comes from the other room. “Not for me,” she says firmly. “I know what I want.”
Her words break through Eric’s reverie. “I agree,” he says.
The two of them look at each other tentatively as the game ends and the kids burst into the kitchen, oblivious to the relaxing tension between their parents. “Are the cookies ready yet?” asks Sophie, hauling herself onto the stool next to me.
“They are,” Eric says. He puts them on a plate as Sophie and Owen tell me about why they decided on chocolate chips instead of raisins or, worse, cranberries. I rise in their esteem when I agree it was the correct choice, unlike the other adults in the house, who were apparently Team Raisin. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Eric hesitantly take Kelsey’s hand, and although she freezes, she doesn’t shake him off. This seems like a good start.
I put away the perfume before the kids can get hold of it and bring my attention back to my family.
***
When I get home, Mom is surprised Eric and Kelsey didn’t take the Aiai I offered them, and sighs. “I miss the children,” she says.
“You know what you need to do.”
“I do.”
I leave it at that, knowing it will take her time to apologize to Kelsey.They might never be close—I know I’ll never see Kelsey as a friend—but perhaps they can find their way to a respectful relationship.
I pull out my phone, wondering if I should visit Rafe as the next stop on my British Columbia apology tour, when Mom casually mentions that he and Eddie Jin are in Ottawa. “Missy is looking forward to this expansion,” she says. “It’s been good to talk to her about the new direction for Yixiang as well.”
