“I didn’t kiss him,” is the first thing that comes out. Which is really, really stupid—because even if I didn’t kiss him in that moment, we definitely did that day we swam to the beach.
A lot.
And Kat goes right in for the kill. “You didn’t kiss him right then, or ever? Because it sure doesn’t look like you’re just—what did you call it? ‘Coworkers who chat sometimes at Pearl’s’?”
“We… we are coworkers,” I babble. “And friends. Good friends—enough that I definitely should have told you that. But we’re not, like… together.”
“I’m not an idiot, Amelia. Nothing about that says ‘just friends.’ I know something’s going on between you. Ruby saidshe’d been watching you for a while before she took the picture.”
Ruby sent her the photo? Did Kat ask her to spy on me, or did Ruby do it on her own? I flip through my mental memory box, wondering if we ever mentioned the pact to her… but then I realize it doesn’t really matter. Kat has photo evidence, and I just have to tell her everything.
I stand and start pacing around my room. To my door, pivot, around my bed and to the window, then back again.
“It started out as nothing,” I say. “We saw each other at Pearl’s and we’d chat, but then he drove me home after work a few times, like when it was dark or raining, and we started talking a little more. Becoming friends, you know? And then we started texting, too, and I saw him out at parties and stuff. He’s a lot different than I thought, and it turns out we have a lot in common, and I think he feels sort of misunderstood and I realized maybe so have I. But, God, Kat. I never meant for this to happen. I didn’t mean to spend so much time with him, but it just happened, and you know I’ve always liked him, and now he likes me, too—”
“Of course you’ve always liked him! We both have!” Kat explodes. “That’s why we made the pact in the first place! You were never supposed to go for him, Amelia. Neither of us was. Youpromised.”
Hot tears build beneath my eyelids. “I know,” I whisper.
“And what’s worse is you lied to me. All this time you’ve pretended you barely knew him. You made it sound like you hardly saw him, and even then, that it was only at work. Friends don’t lie to each other like that.”
“You’re right.” I stop in the middle of my room, noddingmiserably even though she can’t see me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do this.”
Kat laughs, and it’s awful. Harsh and nasty. “Right, your thumb slipped every time you hit Send on a text to him.”
“I just meant I didn’t plan for this to happen,” I offer weakly. “He actually texted me first by accident—”
“What do you mean, by accident?”
Shit. Why, why did I have to say that? I scramble to think how I can explain that away without mentioning what happened at that first bonfire of the summer, but then I remember what Ruby said last night. Chuck remembered Myles saying he wanted to get Kat’s number before she moved. Especially now that I know Ruby’s feeding local gossip back to her, it’s very possible that piece of information will be passed along too.
My guilty conscience needs to be wiped clean. If I ever have a hope of fixing this with Kat, I have to lay it all out. Every single thing, and then take it from there. Secrets are what got me here in the first place, and I’m learning what happens when they come to light.
Which they eventually all do.
I take a deep breath, then exhale slowly. “Do you remember that party we went to on your last night in town?”
“Yeah,” she says, and I can tell she’s wondering what that has to do with anything.
“I’m not sure where you were right then, because everyone kept wanting to say goodbye to you, but Myles came up to me at one point. He… he, um, asked me for your number.”
A beat of silence passes. “Mynumber?”
“Yeah. But at the time, I was distracted and didn’t hear him right, and thought he wanted my number. Like, to switch shifts at work and stuff—I swear, I didn’t think it was for anything more. It wasn’t until he texted me and called me Kat that I realized my mistake.”
“Myles Ford asked formy number, and you never told me?” Kat says, her voice eerily calm. “And then you decided to snatch that opportunity for yourself?”
It sounds horrible, hearing her say it. What I’m about to say feels like it’s just an excuse, and maybe it is, but it’s also the truth. “The first time he texted was right around when Margarine got sick, and I was so worried about her, and I couldn’t get ahold of you, and he was there and willing to talk me through it. I told him right away that it was me and I’d messed up, but then we just sort of… kept talking.”
“So you never actually gave him my number? Like he wanted?”
A tear slides down my cheek. “No. I didn’t. I’m sorry.”
“Stop saying that! Stop saying you’re sorry. This was no accident, Amelia. You kept this up all summer. You obviously weren’t thinking about me or how I would feel about any of this. The second I wasn’t around and you saw an opening with Myles, you took it.” She exhales audibly with a sound of disgust. “I know a lot of girls who would do the same thing, honestly. I just never thought you were one of them. I thought our friendship was more important to you than that.”
“It is,” I insist. “You are important to me. I—”
“No. You know what? I don’t want to hear any more. Screwyou, Amelia. I’m done.” Everything goes quiet, and I pull the phone away from my ear to check the screen.
