“I love you.” He spoke the words like they were timed, like if he did not release them he might very well explode. His eyes studied mine. “I love you, Georgiana.”
His words squeezed my heart, sliced it into shreds. Like fireworks in my chest and smoke in my eyes.I love you too, I wanted to cry. But I couldn’t release the words and tie myself to him. Not when binding our hearts would cost him the future he’d planned for.
He pressed his forehead against mine. “Don’t leave.”
I swallowed down the lump forming in my throat. I’d thought by coming here I could erase the past, that things could be as they once were. A second chance for friendships and finding my place.
Instead, I’d continued on the same path as before. I’d hurt the person I cared most for.
“But look what I’ve done to you,” I whispered.
Jane rushed back in, pouring water into the basin. I tooka rag from her hand and dipped it in with renewed purpose. Lucas waited on the bed as I wrung out the cloth, then I sat beside him, and gently worked away the blood.
“Is the doctor coming?” I asked.
He nodded, studying me.
“Good. You’ll need a stitch or two.” I thumbed his brow.
“This was not your fault, Georgiana.”
I shook my head. Of course it was. “But it happened. By tomorrow, everyone will be talking about it.”
Lucas held my wrist. “So we’ll stay in. Avoid them. Read books, learn a duet, whatever you like, until the whisperings have run their course.”
A lovely thought. Perhaps wecouldwait them out. It was only a game, after all. But what then? My last public kiss had been the real scandal, but this time had proved that Society would never truly forget my past. I could smile and converse with them, but they’d always be watching, waiting for me to take another wrong turn. They were vultures waiting for prey, and I would no longer entertain them.
“This past month has taught me so much about myself. I returned to London thinking this life—London Society—was what I wanted. But it isn’t. I do not enjoy it as I thought I would—the games, the dinner parties—it is all so exhausting.”
“I understand.” He nodded, swallowing. “I have several estates in the country. Do you remember, at the Waymonts’, we spoke of Tinlow Court? Let me take you there. In a few months, Parliament will have adjourned—”
“I want to go home, Lucas.”
“ThenIwill come withyou.”
I took the ring box from the bedside table and handed itto him. I softened my voice, and the truth we’d both known all along. “You are the Duke of Marlow. You are bound to your duty. To the dukedom. This, and London Society, will always be your life.”
His jaw worked, gaze set upon the little box in his hand. “Last night you said you wanted more too. Is that not true?”
“Lucas—”
“Please, Georgiana.” His eyes reddened.
“BecauseI love you,” I whispered, “I will not stay. You need more than what I can give you.”
“You are wrong. I need exactlyyou.” He took my hand and placed the box in my palm. “Give me time, and I will prove it to you. Stay, and let me court you properly. I will burn every gossip paper that comes within arm’s reach of this house. I will snuff anyone who so much as blinks wrong at you. Whatever you need, I will do. Only tell me. Tell me what you need, Georgiana.Ineed you tostay.”
“I do not doubt you,” I whispered, gently setting the ring box back on the bed. “But I know a truth you have still yet to learn. Remember what I told you in the passageway, and again in the stables?”
“I cannot control another person, nor their mind.”
I nodded. “You deserve someone who makes all thiseasier. Someone stronger than I can be.”
“It is time to go, Miss Wood,” Jane said from the door.
“Do not leave me.” His voice broke.
I shook my head. “Notyou, Lucas. Neveryou.” I leaned in and kissed his cheek. “I must go. Please forgive me.”
