She locked eyes with me, then looked away, chin raised, with a face determined to maintain disassociation. Would that I could read behind those eyes.
“That is very thoughtful, Graham.” My mother turned to Anna. “Miss Lane?”
She cleared her throat. “I chosesurprising,” she said, but instead of facing me, she looked to my mother. “Your son has surprised me this visit. How he behaves, his motives and priorities. In truth, I believe my assumptions of his character these past few years were ... wrong.”
My chest constricted, skin prickling from the sensation. She ...what?
Mother smiled gently. The only sound was the ticking of the clock on the mantel.
“And I wonder,” Anna continued, when the room stayed quiet, “how a man juggles so many things without going mad.”
A hint of a smile quirked her lips, but the thoughtsbehind her eyes kept her from showing it fully. She seemed almost remorseful. But, why? I could not bear it. I wanted the fire back in her eyes. I wanted to make her laugh.
“Perhapsmadwould be a better adjective, hmm?” I studied her even countenance, desperately searching for a way in, to no avail.
“Surprisingis a very fitting word for my Graham,” Mother said, and Anna looked up. “And while I agree that Miss Lane is exceptionallybrave, it’s a rather obvious description, isn’t it? So, on the basis of thoughtfulness, I shall award champion to Miss Lane. Well done, my dear.”
Anna nodded once, then smoothed her skirts. “Thank you both for the diverting game,” she said in a quiet voice. Then, carefully, she pushed her letters forward, and stood. “I think I shall retire. Prepare for an early start tomorrow.”
I stood so abruptly in response, my chair nearly toppled over. “I look forward to it,” I said, clasping my hands behind my back.
Fool. Utter, utter fool.
With a gentle smile, and a nod of her head, Anna left.
“Surprising?” Mother muttered as I fell back into my seat. “How exactly do you behave in London?”
I hadn’t considered the differences in my behavior before. More serious, perhaps? “Focused.”
But it was more than that, wasn’t it? I’d been so focused I’d nearly missed her. The most incredible woman. I’d lost myself, and somehow, she’d found me.
I watched the empty doorway, straining my ear for the sounds of Anna’s departure.
The line between us was blurring.
“I’ll admit that young woman is not an easy one to sway,”Mother said. “But neither does she seem as biting a beast as you’ve portrayed in the past. She can be rather warm and inquisitive.”
I leaned back in my chair, balancing my elbow on the arm, my jaw resting on my fist. Things between Anna and me were complicated. “She’s said awful things to me. Made me feel so foolish and small.”
“And you’ve been perfectly honorable back?” Mother smirked.
I raised a brow. She could not understand. Dislike had grown into distrust over the years. We’d both been cruel. We’d both defended ourselves and our homes. Still, Mother waited, as though she dared me to respond to her probing. I hadn’t acted honorably, but Anna had kindled her fair share of arguments.
“The woman irks me to no end.”
“She did not seem to irk you tonight. Nor earlier this morning at the lending library.”
I rubbed my hands on my thighs, shaking my head. “What is it, Mother? Would you like me to admit that she’s tolerable?She’s tolerable.There.”
Mother tilted her head in amusement, eyes glinting with secrets. “I am simply trying to say that in regards to your future, you should consider the fact that marriage to the right person—”
“Oh, dash it all—” I raked both hands through my hair, then over my weary eyelids.
“—could greatly increase your happiness.”
“Thank you, yes. That’s quite enough.”
“She’s lovely, Graham. She matches your wit and your humor. She looks at you like an equal.”
