It’s a delirious mix, having the pleasure of discovering her body for the first time, and feeling like I know her so well, all at once. She’s trembling beneath me, and I want to be the one who makes her feel this way, always. I’ve tried so hard not to contemplate what that means, but now it’s right there, so close to the surface.
Her fingers slip under the waistband of my boxers. I’m so hard that I’m testing the strength of the elastic, and Becca wastes no time slipping her hand inside and gripping me in her fist so tight my vision loses focus.
“Oh, god, Becks,” I say, burying my face in her neck. Her long hair smells like strawberries, and I remember what she looked like in that dress—like a fucking princess, with her shoulders bare and the jewels glittering. I’m scared for a minute that I’ll never be able to be the kind of man she deserves. It’s not something I’ve worried about with anyone else, but Becca deserves everything good in the world and I feel like an asshole even thinking I could ever be enough.
What she’s doing with her hands is rapidly going to be enough to tip me right over the edge, though, and I gasp against her shoulder, tilting my hips to change the angle, then turning my head to whisper her name in her ear.
“Nate,” Becca says, her voice deep and raw. “Would you really have bent me over the bed if I’d asked you to?”
My groan comes out more as a growl. “Roll over.”
My body is fire. I turn over so I’m kneeling bent in front of Nate, feeling myself opening to him, that low pulsing back and stronger than ever, a constant beat of desire.There’s movement behind me as he takes off his boxers and then suddenly he’s right there between my cheeks, not yet inside me but so close, and I let out another moan.
“Do we need a condom?” he asks.
The thought of him pulling away right now is unbearable, and I’m so glad that I can tell him this: “I’m on the pill, and I’m clean.”The show made us take tests beforehand, so I know that for sure.
“Good enough for me,” he says, and then he enters me and fills me up and I groan, because oh my god, how incredible that feels. We both pause for this long, delirious moment, feeling the headiness of this, and then, as if we both can’t wait a second longer, he begins thrusting at the same time as I shift back against him and we’re moving against each other and completely together, hard and fast and so, so, glorious, lifting me higher and higher—
Oh my god, she feelsso good. I pull back and then enter her again and it’s even more delicious, and then I’m thrusting and she’s rocking and we’re both moaning together. She clenches me tight, and we’re moving faster and faster, fucking desperately like we’ve both been searching for this release since the moment we met, and I think maybe we have.
I love her, I realize. I knew it before, but I didn’t want it to be true, not this gorgeous woman who wanted someone else. I’ve loved her for a while, I think, long before I realized what was happening, and being with her like this now feels so good and so right. Like something I’ve been waiting my entire life to find.
The pleasure of being with her like this is incredible, but I’m suddenly hit by this wave of need to kiss her, to look her in the eyes, to connect. I slip out of her, and she lets out a groan like she doesn’t want me to stop.
I don’t mean to.
Nate draws back, and the ache pulls a low, pleading sound from me. I look back around, fear prickling under my skin. Wasn’t he enjoying that? Does he not want to—
But no, the expression on his face is far from someone about to say they don’t want to do this anymore.
“Come here,” he says, his voice quiet but intense.
I do, because I don’t want to be away from him. Not now. Not ever. He draws me onto his lap so I’m straddling his waist, my legs out behind him. His eyes are locked on mine, and I want so much to read love in that intensity—desperate, raw, everything kind of love.The kind that I know is in mine, because it’s in every part of me.
I love you, I can imagine him saying.I need you.
Oh, how I love and need him too.
And then he enters me again, pushing up into me so deep I see stars. No, not stars. Fireworks. Blues and reds and greens and yellows flashing in my vision, more beautiful than they’ve ever been before.
My eyes are closed, but I feel him lean against me, the heat of his chest pressed against mine, just an instant before we’re kissing again. His lips taste like sex and salt and fire. I wrap my arms around his neck, our mouths crashing harder as he moves under me thrusting up with his hips, rocking me against him with his hands.The fireworks are brighter and bolder and loud in my ears, right alongside the noises of rising pleasure we’re both making, and then everything splits apart in me all over again, even stronger—
Bright. Blinding.
All-consuming bliss.
I never believed that being with someone could feel this true and right. But I should have known.
I should have known, because it’s Nate.
