“How about tomorrow?” Aunt Kitty asks.
“Brilliant. Thank you.”
What just happened?
“Now that we have that settled and I won’t have to see you working out in such garbage again, let’s get down to business. Did you or did you not offer my niece money?”
To Theo’s credit, he nods and says, “I did.”
“Did you offer it expecting sexual favors in return?”
Jesus, Aunt Kitty.
“I did not.”
“That’s the right answer, even though I’m unclear whether or not she’d offer sexual favors?—”
“Noooooo,” I say. “There will be no sexual favors for money. How many times do I have to say that?”
“Just checking, just checking. Sometimes desperation creeps up on us, and I just want to double down on your hard line.”
“It’s firm, the line is not breaking.”
“Did you hear that?” Aunt Kitty asks Theo, pointing her finger at him with authority. “A hard line. Are you going to be okay with that?”
“Perfectly content with not having to pay money for sexual favors.”
Lowering her finger, she smoothly runs her eyes over him before saying, “That’s very mature of you. So then, you actually have the money?”
“I have the money.”
“Very well.” She adjusts her visor. “We’re going to need one hundred thousand dollars.”
Dear God.
“Thirty,” I say. “Only thirty.”
“Shhhh, let’s see how much we can get out of him,” Aunt Kitty says. “Aim high, sweetie, don’t settle for the bare minimum—a life lesson you should learn.”
“No.” I glance up at Theo. “It’s only thirty thousand dollars.”
“Either way, I’m good for it,” he says with a smirk.
He’s good for one hundred thousand dollars? By God, is he the lord of a money forest where bills just fall from trees?
“And you could cut us a check, right here, right now, converted to dollars, not pounds?” Aunt Kitty asks.
“I would be able to transfer the thirty thousand U.S. dollars right now, yes, even though technically, you would receive more in pounds,” he says with a nod.
“Well, then if that’s the case, we agree. We will take your money. And we want it in pounds.”
“Aunt Kitty, that’s not?—”
“Great,” he says casually. “Under one condition.”
He pauses, studying us with a conspiratory smirk.
“I knew it,” I say with a head shake. “I knew there was some sort of angle. What is it? I have to marry you to get the money?Well, guess what, I’m not that desperate. I will not stoop that low to get money. I’d rather…sell feet pics online than marry someone for money.”
