“We have a message,” Aunt Kitty says, finger pointing to the air in excitement.
“Wait, seriously?” I ask as I move to her side.
“Oh, this jolly old chap couldn’t resist the fishing. I knew it.”
“It’s probably just a rejection email, letting us down nicely. You know how they do?—”
“He’s coming to Massachusetts.”
“Shut your ass,” I shout as I take the tablet away from her and stare down at the message—It’s a Match. “Oh my God, he’s coming here. What does this mean? Is he investing in the candy store?”
“I don’t know, you took the tablet before I could read anything.” She takes the tablet back and reads his message out loud. “Hello Renley, it’s nice to ‘meet’ you. Your profile caught my attention and I see that we’re a match. Not really sure how any of this works, but I booked a flight and I’m headed your way. I should be in Cape Meril by tomorrow. Hope that isn’t too presumptuous. I’d love to meet up and chat before we move forward on anything. Does tomorrow work for you?” Aunt Kitty looks at me and smiles. “By the teat of Zeus, we snagged ourselves a whale.”
Then she starts typing away, so I quickly snag the tablet from her before she can say anything insane.
“What are you doing?”
“Writing him back.”
“I can see that, but don’t you think we should discuss what we want to say before we type it?”
“What is there to discuss? We’re a match, he’s coming here to discuss logistics, and then he’s handing over the dough, simple as that.” She touches her chin with her finger. “By the way, I was thinking about our projected spending amount, and twenty thousand feels a touch shy, especially if we want new windows and need to refinish the floors. I say we try to boost him up to thirty and turn that candy store intotheplace to be. Shove it up Marjorie’s flared nostrils.”
“I don’t want to overextend.”
“We didn’t give him a number—for all he knows this is a hundred-thousand-dollar investment. I think if we come in at thirty grand, he’s going to think junk change and then shower us with bills as we dance around the front yard, claiming victory.”
She’s right, we didn’t say a number, at least I don’t think we did. And it would help to have some cushion, just in case the renovations take a little bit more money.
“Okay, yeah, we can ask for that, but not in the message. I think we cross that bridge when we get there.”
“Of course, and don’t forget, he’s DTF, down to finance, so I think asking for thirty grand is not going to blow his loafers off, you know?”
“Right. Right.” I nod my head. “Okay, so what should we say back?”
“Let’s keep it casual, say you’re available tomorrow, and that you would love to meet up.”
“Okay, yeah, that works.”
Aunt Kitty blows on her fingers and then starts typing again while speaking out loud. “Dear Theodore.” She pauses. “Should we say Theodore or Mr. Williams?”
“How did he sign off on his message?”
“Theo,” Aunt Kitty replies. “Ooh, he’s young and hip, I like that about him. A real go-getter. Theodore hires people to do things for them, but Theo, Theo is getting his hands dirty, he’s digging up worms and putting them on the fishhook himself.”
“Why do you keep bringing up fishing? Did he say he liked fishing?”
“No, but I’m sure he liked that you like fishing. I bet that’s something you can bond over. Shall I add it to the message?”
“No. I don’t want to scare him away.”
She nods. “Very well. Okay, ‘Dear Theo. Thank you for getting back to me. I’d love to meet up tomorrow. How does the morning sound? Here’s my address. I’ll be sure to have fresh scones ready and waiting. Cheerio, Renley.’ Annnnd, send.”
“Wait,” I yell, reaching for the tablet, but the message is already gone. “Oh my God, you sent that?”
“Yes, I thought it was a great message. Very casual, very breezy. Just like this tracksuit.” Aunt Kitty swishes her hips around in circles. “Although, I remember this being looser back in the day. Must have shrunk in the wash.”
Ignoring her, I say, “Aunt Kitty, you said cheerio and you gave him our address.”
