“You gave me something so much better, beautiful,” I promised, stealing a quick kiss from his frowning mouth.
He graced me with a smile that was pure sunshine, chasing away all the shadows that lingered in my soul. It filled me with light until I overflowed with it. My hand found its way into his and I brushed a kiss over his knuckles, never looking away from those soulful blues.
“Let’s go before our escort out there gets trigger happy with the fire alarm.”
Dawson led us out of the apartment to where Fin was waiting impatiently in the hallway. He griped to Dawson about how hungry he was as we made our way to the elevator, but I barely heard their conversation.
My mind was still spinning with the knowledge that Dawson hadn’t been with anyone else since me. I wished more than anything I could say the same, but I couldn’t change the past.
Loneliness and heartbreak were a potent cocktail that my disease fed on, fueling poor decisions that I’d regretted as soon as I could remember what I’d done. I didn’t have a lot of other partners, but even one was too many. They may have had my body, but only Dawson had my heart.
Chapter 23
Theo
“An exploding crayon? A laser pointer? Oh! A butt plug!”
“Why the fuck would ‘butt plug’ be an option in Pictionary?”
“Excuse me, Bob Ross, but you’re the one whose happy little drawing over there looks like a butt plug. Hawkins, back me up on this.”
“Again, this a game fornormalpeople, not a Rorschach test for the Sexually Frustrated, Griffin. Feeling a little pent up, are we, neighbor?”
“Hey, I haven’t exactly heard you and Dan rattling the walls lately either, cutie. Trouble in paradise already?”
Fin’s and Griffin’s arguing had been going for several minutes and neither of them even heard the timer when their turn was over. It was infinitely more amusing than the actual game. Everyone had given up trying to stop them during Scattergories earlier, and I was living for the free entertainment.
“You know, we can stop now and just hang out,” Aly suggested loudly over their verbal barbs.
Fin capped the marker with a huff, shooting Griffin a glare sharp enough to cut glass. “Fine. It was a space shuttle launch by the way, you big boob.”
Griffin’s face twisted in bewilderment and he waved wildly at the easel. “How the hell was I supposed to guess that? Whoever chose to draw random names for teams, you can fuck all the way off. I got cheated.”
His comment drew Fin into another round of bickering and the knowing looks that were tossed around the room suggested everyone but those two morons saw what was going on between them. Oh well. They’d figure that shit out eventually.
We all settled in the living room afterwards, drinking and laughing about shit that wasn’t half as funny without alcohol. With every sip, my anxiety about feeling like an outsider drained away.
I was a bundle of nerves and tension when we’d walked in, wondering if I was going to be ignored or looked at like I was “crazy” again. I’d suffered through awkward silences and judgmental glances from my so-called friends before, and I’d do it again. For Dawson. To carve out a place for me in his world.
I also didn’t want to admit that a part of me was afraid that Dawson would hide what we were, playing the part of long lost friend rather than reunited lover. I’d embarrassed myself twice already in front of his friends, proving repeatedly that I wasn’t good enough for Dawson. Why would he want to claim a disaster like me anyway?
I had steeled myself for his dismissal. Instead, he’d squeezed my hand and pecked me on the mouth in view of all his gawking friends before going to grab food. And when Fin, Aly, and Micah had pounced on me with a dozen excited, but intrusive questions, Dawson had chastised them all for overwhelming his boyfriend.
Boyfriend.
A title I hadn’t held in years. One I never expected I’d be lucky enough to earn back. It was a shot of adrenaline straight to my veins, and I was still flying high on it hours later.
I was stretched out on the floor, reclining against the couch with Dawson pressed up next to me. He threw a leg over mine and fiddled with my left hand absently, laughing at something I’d missed because I’d been caught up staring at him. I had four years to make up for, after all.
Dawson elbowed me in the side, jolting me out of my daze. I glanced around to eyes staring at me expectantly.
“Sorry, what did I miss?”
Nate chuckled, tipping his beer bottle towards Dawson. “We asked if you were coming to the game next Saturday. It’s a big one too since it’s the season opener and the Hayes family showdown. It’s a can’t-miss event!”
“Hayes family showdown?” I asked Dawson.
“We’re playing Baylor. It’s been a whole thing since my freshman year here. Dani rooted for them even before she got into the damn school, so the first time we played against them, there were some…heated exchanges in our house. Ever since, it’s been me and Dad versus Dani and Mom. They even decorate our family suite at the stadium in both school colors, really driving home the whole ‘house divided’ shtick, but I always invite some friends to come too.”
