Day in and day out, DiAngelo and I go about our lives, pretending we’re completely unaware of the behemoth pachyderm munching leaves in the corner.
Is that an elephant in the room? No way.
Did DiAngelo say my body belonged to him? Of course not.
Did I suck his cock and tell him to come on my tits? That’s absurd.
Nothing of the sort happened. It’s all a figment of my imagination…
Except it isn’t.
We both know it happened, and the knowledge is maddening. A hysterical voice in my head is constantly screaming all the things I want to say but can’t. Not whenhe is so adamant that it was all a big mistake. Instead, every conversation is civil, distant, and shreds at my sanity with poisonous talons.
I should be glad he pulled away. My logical mind knows I’m better off this way. But my heart keeps manufacturing excuses to be around him—interrupting him in his office to ask about dinner plans, or getting a glass of water after we’ve both gone to bed just so that I can walk past him on the sofa in the living room.
It’s not healthy. I shouldn’t be so drawn to him, but I can’t help myself. Even now, I walk back to his office to ask him if he’s already put in the next grocery order. I don’t actually need to add anything, but I will if it means chatting with him about it.
“Yeah, delivery is scheduled for tomorrow morning. You need to add something?” DiAngelo sets his phone on the desk and gives me his full attention.
His penetrating stare puts me on a pedestal, strips me bare, and worships at my feet.
Even when he’s distant, he makes me feel more seen than I’ve ever felt in my life. And if that wall between us were to come down? Would life ever be the same again?
“No, that’s fine. I was just curious.” I flash a weak smile and start to turn.
“Hold up.”
His words hook me around the middle and spin me back toward him. Has he changed his mind about us being a mistake? Is he going to beg me for more?
Anticipation lights my eyes as I bring my gaze back to his. “Yeah?”
“I have to go out on business for a while. I have someone coming over to stay with you while I’m gone.”
And just like that, the heart-shaped balloon in my chest deflates, sputtering against the walls of my rib cage until all that’s left is a stretched-out piece of empty red rubber.
“Yeah, okay,” I say in an artificially high voice, then disappear down the hallway in record time.
The next hour is spent berating myself for being such an idiot. By the time the elevator buzzes to let us know someone is on the way up, I’m emotionally exhausted, which is why the sight of my temporary babysitter is such a welcome relief.
“Rina Banina, long time no see!”
“Ciro!” I beam at my old friend who lifts me plumb off the ground in a crushing hug.
CHAPTER 36
DIANGELO
Present
What the fuckjust happened here? My head is filled with strategies for tracking down intel on the threat to Terina when I’m suddenly feeling like I walked onto the set ofThe Bachelor. Not that I watch that shit, but the commercials are hard to escape.
I didn’t realize Ciro knew Terina. Dickhead didn’t say anything when I called and asked him to come by. Now, I’m wishing I’d asked someone else. Anyone else.
I slam the door shut, startling the two out of their hug. “Come on in,” I say dryly. “Sounds like introductions aren’t necessary.”
“Yeah.” Ciro grins. “Rina and I went to high school together.”
“He was a year ahead of me but was sweet enough to take me to senior prom even though he’d graduated.” She’s radiating happiness as she tells me this asshole probably took her virginity, and all I can do is listen as she continues. “Dad was super protective and told me the only way I could go was if it was with someone he trusted.”
