I feel like the wind has been knocked out of me.
And then I see the captions.
“Revealed! Chaeji talks future with business boyfriend! Marriage and kids soon?”
“Seoul’s Next Power Couple dines out, shows love”
“Happy at Last! Chaeji finds her prince charming”
“Sun, no, it’s not like that,” Nikko says, scooting down to sit next to me and pull me into a hug with one arm while he uses the sleeve of his other to wipe the tears that have started trailing over my cheeks.
“I knew. Iknewsomething was going on! Why? Why is he there? What isn’t he telling me?” I ask, words slurring together as I let myself fall against Nikko and press my face to his shoulder. “What is he hiding? I don’t understand.”
Nikko shifts to hold me tighter. “You know this is not what that stupid site wants you to think it is. YouknowKija isn’t stepping out on you. Whatever is going on is not what it looks like right there. You know that, and you know him.”
I don’t know anything right now except how badly my chest aches. I trust him, but the silence and the surprise are too much for me to be able to think logically about whatever is happening.
“Sun.” Nikko turns my head to face him, then takes my phone out of my hand, slips it in his pocket, and pulls me into another tight hug. “You’re okay. You’ll get answers. SP is never right about anything, and that’s not going to change tonight.” He pauses and gives me a hopeful little smile. “Or, I mean, I could call them and tell them we’re hanging out in a dark alley, and they could have a true story for once?”
The chuckle I give him is half-hearted at best. “Can we go home?” I ask. Even hidden here in the shadows, I feel too exposed. I need to crawl back into my nest until I can talk to Kija.
“Of course.” He packs up our food and grabs my hand, holding on as we walk back to our building.
I don’t miss the way he keeps glancing over to check on me, and I feel like I should say something, but I just can’t.
I need an explanation.
I need Kija to look me in the eye and tell me that I’m being crazy about this and it’s unnecessary for me to worry.
I need him to hold me until I’m sure I won’t fall apart.
SEVENTEEN
KIJA
“What the fuck?”
I flinch at the first words Sun hurls at me as I walk through the door at Jase and Nikko’s place, even though I know I deserve them. Noel growls at me from where she’s positioned herself next to Sun, clearly on high alert as his emotional support gremlin.
When Jase texted me on my way home to let me know that Sun was staying with them tonight because he was upset, I knew I had to stop by and talk to him. Even though I haven’t been able to decide what exactly I’m going to tell him about the situation, I have to apologize to him. The silence has gone on too long, and I don’t want to avoid him or leave him in the dark any longer.
“Sun…” I start, but whatever I was going to say shrivels up on my tongue as I get a better look at him. His eyes are rimmed with red, sadness evident in all his body language. It makes my heart ache. “I’m sorry. That’s not enough, but it’s true. I’m so sorry…”
“Why were you with her? You ignore me all day, and then I see that you’re out withher?” he cries. “What thefuck, Kija?”
“I know I need to explain. And I will. But I also need you to know that I am sorry I went missing today and made youworry.” I move cautiously toward where he is curled up on the couch in a pile of blankets, stopping before I sit near him. Noel snarls at me, like she’s ready to intervene. “May I?”
“Only if you start talking immediately,” he snaps, but it sounds tired, worn out.
“Hey, we’re going to leave and give you two some privacy,” Jase announces, startling me a bit because I was so focused on Sun that I had already forgotten where we are and that they’re here, too.
“No, stay,” Sun insists, giving Nikko a pleading look.
I hate that he feels this way—angry and hurt enough he doesn’t want to be left alone—but, again, I am immensely grateful for both Nikko and Jase and the comfort and support they provide to both of us.
“If you’re sure,” Nikko murmurs, perching on Jase’s lap on a chair across the room.
“That’s fine.” I nod, sitting gingerly on the edge of the couch cushion, giving Sun space and keeping my distance from his guard dog. “You’d need to hear it all eventually anyway.” I huff out a long sigh, still unsure where to start. “I was out with Chaeji because I had something that I needed to take care of,” I say eventually, pulling my phone out of my pocket and flipping to the most damning of the photos, then handing it to Sun.
