“You need to stop fighting this so hard,” he said.
For the first time ever, I was listening. Really listening, as he just kept talking. All the words coming out of his mouth stinging. Cutting me. Hurting where he knew he was getting to me. Because he was.
“…and that is where I will hang up on you,” he finished. “Your choice. Your decision. I walk away, and you keep doing what you’re doing. Or you ask me to come see you on Friday and we fuck all of this out of our system so we can think clearly again.”
“What?” I’d lied. Because I didn’t think I’d understood anything of what he was saying.
“You’re either all in, or you’re out, Georgie.”
“I don’t want things to be like this,” I admitted as my thoughts criss-crossed dangerously in my head. I needed to calm down. Take control. Figure out how to… Crap.
“Are you breaking up with me?” I whispered, panic suddenly joining my body.
“Baby,” he said, and there was that smile. He knew exactly what he was doing, playing me like this. “I’m not playing games here. I’m just stating a fact. If you want this? Want to be with me, and do this, all the way?”
“I let you fuck me and then what?”
“No.” He grinned. “That’s not what I’m saying. Baby, listen.”
I was listening. Finally. Properly, as he pinned his eyes on me.
“I want you. I want everything with you. And for that to happen, we both need to drop the bullshit and realise that we’ve probably been together since college. Probably loved each other the whole fucking time. I’m just playing catch-up with all of that, but you need to stop having your head so far up your arse that you can’t see your own worth. You’re mine. You’re amazing. You’re…”
He sniffled. Scratched his nose.
“You’re worth so much more than the bullshit you’re going through at work and living in that crappy flat and feeling so worthless. Because you’re not. You’re loved and…” He smiled knowingly. “Have someone who wanks off to the thought of your little nose and your smile and that cute dick of yours exploding into my hand. So hot, baby. So make your mind up. What do you want? Because if you want it? You’ll have to come get it.”
“You said you were coming here?” I was so stupid. So bloody stupid.
“No. I said I’m going to get my stupid brother and get in the car and go sort Dad out. Then? When you’ve had a sleep and sorted your pretty little head out? Then you let me know what you want. All of what you want.”
“I know what I want,” I stated. Clearly. In a proper voice. Like my work voice.
“I know you do.” He looked at me. Stared me down.
“I want to be your boyfriend.” I wasn’t lying. “And everything that goes with that.”
“Not good enough.”
He was going to be the end of me.
“I…” I started, but then stopped. Because I knew what he was after. I did actually listen.
“I’m your baby,” I said. It was hard, but it came out. “And you love me.”
“Good boy,” He whispered.
“I want you to fuck me.”
“I want that too.”
A quiet smile. I couldn’t quite meet his eyes, but I finally did.
“I’m worth everything,” came out of my mouth. “And I deserve better…than this.”
“Finally,” he said. “Go to sleep. Just sleep all this off. I’ll see you in a bit.”
He hung up. And I had no idea what was going on, but I did what I was told. I curled up, still in my suit and tie, and then…I slept.
