“You and I would have a ball. But…unfortunately, I didn’t make the cut to appear on this show. Perhaps a very wise move from production.” She grimaced, but in a kind way. Winked. “But, apart from me? Flattered by the way, viewers, we’ll have to watch this one.” She smiled knowingly at the camera. I hadn’t even realised we were being filmed. The bright, warm light against my face should have been a clue, but to be honest? I wasn’t thinking clearly.
“Someone who will make me smile. We all want that, don’t we? Someone warm and caring, who’s good company. Does that make sense?” I briefly managed to smile.
“Is physical attraction important to you? As a man of a different generation to myself, do you feel you could learn to love someone who may perhaps look a little different from your ideal partner?”
“I’m not that old. And I have two sons who don’t let me forget that the world has changed a great deal since I was their age. But no. Physical appearance, I don’t think it matters much. Laughter, perhaps a glass of wine over good food. Companionship in our twilight years. I don’t ask for much.”
“You said in your pre-show interviews that you had very few demands or expectations. Has that changed as you’ve gone through this experience, leading up to today? Have you learnt anything new about yourself?”
What kind of question was that? A leading one, no doubt. I could see it, the way Gina was wording these things to make me say words that could be edited…and re-hashed. I had been briefed. And I had also watched a whole season ofDivorce Mewith my sons.
What had I been thinking?
“Perhaps, let me word it differently, who are you hoping is NOT behind that door?”
“I have a feeling that whatever I say might come back to haunt me.” I laughed. “So to protect the innocent, and myself, maybe I should say nothing. I just hope it will be someone whom I’ll get on with.”
Lame. Cal would be rolling his eyes had he seen me.
“What I can tell you,” she continued with a knowing smile, “is that I had the absolute pleasure of meeting the person who will become your partner today. An instant coupling with someone whom I think you will thoroughly enjoy spending time with. What we need to remember here isthat our experts and professional matchmakers have spent the past months finding the perfect couples for our show. Everyone has been hand-picked and paired to ensure compatibility on every level. But also, dear viewers, I guarantee you this won’t always be an easy ride. Our contestants are all passionate about their future, and the partners they hope will be part of their lives for a very long time. To remind you, only one couple will win in the end, and that couple will be thrown a no-expense-spared wedding of a lifetime. So,Save the Date. You won’t want to miss this! We will be right back after these messages from our sponsors.”
There was a quick cut, where more make-up got brushed on my face. My hands were caked in it from nervously trying to rub my skin. I had to stop this. Calm down. Speak like the professional human I was, because right now? I was behaving like a twat.
“You’re doing well,” Gina said calmly, sipping water through a straw. Someone held out a tissue for her to dab her lips. “And Mary would have loved this. I am going to ask about Mary next, just so you’re prepared. I was briefed that you were fine talking about her. Everyone loved Mary, and I promise you she will be painted in a positive light. I’ll make sure of it.”
I thought I was supposed to respond, and I was still unsure if the cameras were rolling or not. But I smiled, just in case. Swallowed. Tried to look relaxed when I was anything but.
But I got better, calming down enough to manage to make this Gina smile with my impression of my late wife and my explanation of needing to move on for my sanity, and for my sons. Nobody wanted their dad to grow old disgracefully.
I was a disgrace already, and what felt like an eternity later, I was standing in front of a closed door, an intricate metallic number 4 nailed onto the freshly painted surface.
These were apartments, apparently. The common room backed onto a communal kitchen, and our apartment doors all faced the sofas, with cameras mounted in every corner. A set, masquerading as a home. It felt like anything but, and the microphone hanging around my neck felt heavy against my chest. A transmitter pack was clipped to the back of my trousers.
“Your apartment has cameras running continuously,” this Kirsten droned on. “Every angle is covered, and you will be wearing your microphone packs from eight every morning until ten at night, when filming will cease. The bathrooms are not wired. The balconies off the bedrooms are not wired, but we are not insured for their use, so we ask that you stay off them.”
Wait, what? The balconies. Okay.
“It’s all in your contract.”
I was starting to see that. And wondered what else was in these contracts I’d signed.
“You’re the fourth couple to be installed, and once we have finished filming, you will be left to unpack and get acquainted, but we ask you to keep the noise down until we’ve got everyone set up. At one thirty, there will be a communal brief followed by filming with Gina, and then individual debriefs on camera in Room B. It’s all on the call sheet on your table inside. Read it. Any questions?”
“No,” I managed to croak out.
“Fabulous.” The woman grinned. “So when you’re ready, look into the camera, compose yourself, and when you feel the time is right? Open the door. Then you’ll walk inside, where a second team will film your first meeting. Just be yourself. This is the person you’ve been matched with, and we just know you will have a fabulous time here with us.”
She didn’t sound convinced. Neither did I.
“And, action.”
Chapter 6
Oliver
To say my heart was beating out of my chest was an understatement because despite all that I had already done this morning? The interviews, the filler segments, the filming of small snippets of quotes to use and of course the walkaround of this flat. It looked like a furniture showroom to be honest. The walls wobbled precariously; everything had that air of being far too new, even the windows still bearing the installation stickers, like this was a purpose-built temporary shelter. And I was still panicking on the inside. Truly and pathetically so.
There was a smallish double bed in the middle of the room, with a bathroom off to the side. A small kitchenette and a table and chairs for two. A sofa that definitely wouldn’t hold a grown man comfortably. On purpose, of course. Nobody would be sleeping on that sofa tonight. I was intending to jump in feet first here and ensure the guy who was apparently on the other side of that plywood monstrosity of a door knew exactly that. I wasn’t kidding around here. I’d never been a quitter, and this was supposed to be a sure thing. Instant happiness…of some sort.
