“What are we, twelve?” he teases, helping me pull off his hoodie.He’s seen me naked; I shouldn’t feel insecure around him in a bikini. Instead, I choose not to think about it. I don’t want him to ask questions.I keep my perfectly crafted smile on my face, and he doesn’t ask about it.
“Being twelve is better than having one foot in the grave,” I tease, sticking my tongue out at him.
“You littlebrat,” he says, grabbing me and throwing me over his shoulder like I am merely a sack of flour.
“Beckett!” I screech as he jumps off the ratty dock and into the lake.
I gasp for breath as I come up above the surface, the frigid water chilling my skin.
I look around, and Beckett resurfaces, looking fine as hell. His chest tattoo glistens, water droplets making him look sinful. He runs a hand through his hair and slicks it back out of his face.
I splash water at him, and he smiles while splashing me back.
“It’s fucking cold, why would you do that?” I pout, splashing him again.
He reaches out and tugs me to him. I don’t fight him, letting my arms wrap around his neck.
He watches me carefully, not in the way that says he wants to devour me, but in the way that he’s simply trying to memorize every little detail about me. It makes me feel all warm inside. It makes me forget about everything I’ve ever felt insecure about.
“How are you not freezing?” I whisper. His hands grip my hips as we tread water.
He tilts his head, as if he can’t believe I’m actually asking the question.
“I was a marine for a decade, remember?” He says, and I roll my eyes.
“Actually, I don't, I wasn't even alive for most of it,” I quip, and he pinches my side playfully, making me laugh.
His jaw clenches for just a moment, but before he can say or do anything to make him doubt us, I kiss him.
Not rushed or hungry.Just a kiss.
The kiss only lasts a few seconds, but it’s enough to leave me breathless and wanting more.
“I tease and joke, but I don’t care,” I whisper.
I want him, Ineedhim. I’m slowly starting to realize just how dangerous that feeling is.It’s like he’s climbed inside me and consumed every single piece of my soul.I’ve never felt this way about anything before.Not about another person. Not even social media consumed me the way that he has in such a short amount of time.
I look at him, really look at him.The stubble on his jaw is a few days old.The smallest hint of grey decorates the edges of his dark hair, hardly even noticeable right now because it’s all wet. His wrinkle lines.The little scar he has that cuts into his eyebrow, preventing hair from growing.His muscles.His tattoos and light dusting of dark hair on his chest.
He looks at me, too, his expression much more guarded than I’m sure mine is. I’ve never been able to hide what I’m feeling, not from him.
I want to know what he’s thinking. I want to ask him, and I almost do, but then the words die in my throat.Instead, I push away from him, and we swim and play in the water.
After a little bit, he leaves me alone so that he can go make us lunch.
I float on my back just staring up at the sky. It’s slightly overcast, and there is the smallest breeze rustling the trees. My body has either gone numb or gotten used to the cold.
I’m not too far from shore, just taking in nature.
It’s nice.
I haven’t even thought about my phone or my followers.It’s easy, though.Everything with him is easy, even the stuff that isn’t. He always has a way of just being a distraction in the best way possible.
I close my eyes, allowing myself to feel everything.
I don’t even realize I am crying until I open my eyes and the world is blurry.I’m not really sure why I’m crying in the first place.
Maybe I’m mourning the girl I once was. Maybe I’m celebrating the person I’ve become.Or there’s a hundred other things that it could be. It’s not sobs or tears that ache, and you feel them in your chest.They’re silent, leaking down my temples and disappearing into the water that surrounds me.
