I have no idea where I’d even begin to describe this ache. She’s been right here the whole time, but I haven’t been able to give her the time and attention that she deserves.
I love my job, and I love helping and serving the people of the community, but I’ve also never had someone at home waiting for me until now. I’ve never experienced what it’s like to wake up next to someone and never want to leave the bed. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, and honestly, it scares the shit out of me. But then I look at her, and all of it is worth it. The late nights, the long days, all of it is worth it now because I get to come home to the most beautiful person I’ve ever met in my entire life. I get to come home to something worth staying around for. And Mocha, can’t forget about him, the little ball of fury chaos that he is, he’s also very quickly become important to me.
I knew that I was alone before, but I never realized how much so until the last few weeks. Before April, I would have never batted an eye at basically living at the station all day, every day on high-profile cases, but something in me ached when I didn’t get to come home to her. Something hurt when I didn’t get to kiss her goodnight or check on her to make sure she was ok.
Something in me eased just slightly on the nights that I did get to come home. Even if she was already asleep, I’d pick her up and take her to bed. At least that way I’d get to be with her if only for a few hours.
She’s healed me in a way that I don’t think she’ll ever fully realize. Even if whatever we have doesn’t work out, I’ll always be grateful for this summer and for her.
“Are you ready for breakfast?” she asks, turning her head and looking up at me.
“Mhmm,” I hum, capturing her lips in a soft kiss.
We both sigh into the kiss. I don’t even remember the last time I kissed her properly. Probably that night in the back of my squad car. Even then, I didn’t kiss her the way she deserved.
She nips my bottom lip playfully, and I growl into her mouth.
“Come on, we have a long day ahead of us,” she says, picking up a plate and handing it to me, all without looking away from me, her lips just barely touching mine.
I almost give in and take her back to bed. But I feel my stomach protest at the thought of not eating something first.
“You’re lucky that you’re cute,” I tease. I feel her smile against my lips as she kisses me again.
I pull away from her and take the food.Eggs, bacon, toast, and avocado.
We eat in silence, both of us are lost in our own minds, while we just enjoy each other's company.
We clean up together and get ready for the day. While she gets dressed, I pack the picnic basket that she pulled out of her ass.
“What the hell is this?” I ask, picking up a cheese I wouldn’t even know how to pronounce if I tried. I look down at Mocha, and he looks like he’s not going to be much help.I shrug and cut it into small pieces, putting it in the container she told me ithadto go into.
By the time she’s ready to go, the basket is packed, and I’m sitting on the couch waiting for her.
She comes down wearing a simple outfit, but it looks so good on her. A tank top that’s cropped just above the waist of her jean shorts, and she slips her feet into some sandals that I recently learned are called Birkenstocks and cost an arm and a leg.
I’m not sure why, since I’m pretty sure I’ve seen the same thing at Walmart for ten dollars. But I’m not going to tell her how to spend her money; that is none of my business.
“Ready?”
“Yup,” she says, taking the blanket that’s draped over the banister and Mocha's leash.
The three of us head out the back door and toward my truck, which is parked in the shop.I open the door for her, and Mocha hops in before climbing into the backseat because he’s impatient. She laughs as she gets in, taking the basket and putting it by her feet.
“BECKETT! Stop the truck!” she yells. I slam on the brakes and pull off the road.
“Sloane! You can’t do that, what's wrong?” I ask, looking over at her, expecting her to be dying or something.
“Oh my God, look! It’s a cute little pay-what-you-want stand! We have to stop.”
“No, we don’t.”
“Please! They're all over my homepage. I’ve always wanted to go to one. I’ll only be a second,” she pleads, her eyes turning big and doe-like, in the way she knows I can’t say no to.
“Fine,” I mumble, giving in to her puppy dog eyes and pulling over in front of the stand. She jumps out of the truck, Mocha following right behind her as she takes her wallet and goes over to the stand. I get out of the truck, leaning against it as she looks at everything and grabs a handful of things. Mocha’s wagging his tail, waiting to get some kind of scraps.
She pulls out her phone and starts recording. She’s far enough away that I can’t hear what she’s saying, but I can see that she’s excited. The smile on her face alone is enough to make me glad that I decided to stop.
There are paper bags, and she grabs one, taking what looks like some bread, some jars of jam, some honey,y and some kind of sweets. She pulls out her wallet, and I shake my head at her as she slips a $100 bill into the cash box.
