Had they ever shared me?
Hat trick?I’d nearly gagged when she’d told us that part.
“And then Frasier clocked him. This is unconfirmed, but I’m pretty sure Wilson has a broken nose. Serves him right,” she muttered.
“Fuck yes.” Georgia fist-pumped the air. “As if I didn’t already love Frasier. He and Carson showed that our team won’t stand for the kind of ‘locker-room talk,’ ‘boys will be boys’ bullshit that’s plagued the league for far too long.”
Kylie nodded. “And the fans are loving it.”
It was nice to know we had the fans on our side and that people were sick of the misogynistic, exclusive boys club of the past. And while, yes, the entire exchange was disgusting, I couldn’t have been more proud of Frasier and Carson for how they’d handled it. They had shut it down. They’d called him out.
That said, I didn’t understand how someone could be so callous. Especially a fellow hockey player, regardless of the fact that he had an axe to grind.
I knew Wilson was likely just trying to get a rise out of Frasier. And it had obviously worked. But it made me wonder what other people had been saying about our relationship. I’d been content to live in a bubble, and now I worried that I should’ve paid more attention.
I pulled my phone out of my pocket, navigating to social media to check on my latest post. It was a picture of me at the game with Georgia and Kylie, smiling and ready to cheer on the team. Even though I’d posted it just a few hours ago, the photo already had thousands of comments. I scrolled through the top few to see what had been liked the most.
Georgia leaned over my shoulder, peering down at my screen. “Are you sure that’s a good idea, Bryn?”
Good idea or not, it was something I needed to do.
@sillymillymama So happy for you! I’ve followed your story since you lost your husband. I’m a young widow too, and I’m so glad you’ve found happiness again.
@bookishreading The cutest! Enjoy the game.
@goaliegirlies Love the custom jersey. A nice way to honor your late husband, while celebrating your new relationship.
@puckbunny69 I’d have a threesome with Morgan and Holmes. Get it, girl. That’s hot.
I groaned.I’d been optimistic after the first few comments, but they only got worse after the one from @puckbunny69. I rolled my eyes at her incrediblyunoriginal handle. And then I continued reading, even though I had a feeling I’d regret it. Still…I needed to know what people were saying—about me, but mostly about Derek.
As his widow, I took my responsibility as the steward of his memory very seriously. It was why I’d agreed to interviews and attended tribute games when all I’d wanted was to curl up in a ball and die. It was why I’d told Derek’s story in partnership with the SADS Foundation to promote awareness, even when it gutted me to relive that trauma. And it was a big reason why I’d struggled so much with wearing a jersey with anyone else’s last name and number.
@puckboys responding to @puckbunny69 Me too.
@puckboys responding to @puckbunny69 Do you think they had a threesome while he was still alive? They’ve known each other since college.
@puckbunny69 It’s possible.
@mat706 Now that she collected all the money from his endorsements, she’s ready to move on to her next victim.
@backdoor22 I don’t get why they’re fighting over her. She’s not that hot.
@Hockeyfan301 Let’s hope she’s not a black widow, or the Hawks will lose their best goalie in addition to a talented defenseman. FML. We’re never going to get a Stanley again at this rate.
My hands were shaking so badly,I dropped my phone. Kylie picked it up, holding on to it. Georgia was saying something—at least, her lips were moving. But it felt as if I were underwater, and I couldn’t decipher the words.
I knew that comments of strangers on the internet shouldn’t—didn’t—matter. But in that moment, it felt as if a hot knife had sliced through my chest, cutting me wide open.
Was this truly what people thought about me? That I’d profited off my husband’s death, and now I was so easily moving on? As if I’d never loved him. As if losing him hadn’t been so incredibly painful.
I hated feeling as if I’d betrayed Derek. I hated that anyone was questioning my motivations, my love for him. And the idea that the piece I had left of him—his legacy—might be tarnished beyond repair was heartbreaking.
“I can’t—” I clutched my throat, unable to draw a full breath. “I can’t.Breathe.”
“Hey.” Georgia’s voice was soothing. “Hey.” She guided me to one of the seats in the lounge area of the bathroom. “Slow down. In through your nose…” She waited until I did just that. “Out through your mouth. That’s it. There you go.”
I clawed at my shirt. It felt too tight and all wrong. Ever since I’d put on the custom jersey, my skin had felt itchy and hot. I yanked it over my head and tossed it aside.
