“Open that palm,” he coaches, his voice serious.
I force my fingers to loosen. His chin dips slightly, but I still manage to reach his throat.
“That’s it. You grab that sucker hard, and we’ll see if he can get off the ground to chase after you while he fights for his breath. If you can’t reach the throat, you go for the nose with either your fist or your palm.” He grabs my handand demonstrates the correct positions. “Both can be equally damaging if done correctly.”
His words make me shudder and my stomach turn. “I just hope I never have to use it.”
“Me too. Most people don’t, but I want you to be able to…”
“Run to you.”
His expression warms. “Exactly. Now, if he comes from the back…”
My breathing is labored as Matthew comes from behind me, his arm wrapping around me in a headlock as he pulls me against his chest. I reach for his wrist and elbow, tugging down as I lower into a squat. My elbows press to my sides as I lean forward.
“Just like that.”
My heart beats wildly as I slip out of his grasp. But he doesn’t stop. He tackles me to the ground, his body breaking my fall before he rolls us over so I’m pinned beneath him, his weight resting on my hips.
“Are you crazy?” I pant, but he just arches his brow.
“The attacker will not let go just because, Trouble. What did we say? What are you doing?” he asks, his palms pressing my shoulders to the mat.
“Hand cross grip.” I move my hands in the correct position.
“Elbows down,” Matthew reminds me. “Always keep your elbows down.”
“Right. Elbows down. Cross grip your wrist, but no thumb,” I mutter as I get in position. “Other one on the triceps. One foot over yours, the other one in the center. And now…”
I grit my teeth as I lift my hips, flipping him onto his back, my body falling over his.
Matthew grins at me proudly. “Hell yeah. That’s my girl.”
I sit upright, leaning against my palm as I stare at him. “Was that good?”
“Textbook perfect.” Matthew’s hands land on my thighs, rubbing up and down the outside of my legs. “How are you feeling?”
He’s studying me almost tentatively.
“I—” My breathing is ragged from all the adrenaline coursing through me. “Good. Better.” The corner of my mouth turns upward. “Thank you for teaching me.”
I’m still not sure if I’d ever actually be able to hurt another human being, but having him show me how to do it makes me feel a little bit safer. More like myself.
“Anytime.”
I nod, grazing my lower lip with my teeth as I watch him, trying to catch my breath. His gaze zeroes in on my mouth, his fingers digging into my thighs suddenly, making me aware of our position. Him on the mat, me straddling his lap.
I move slightly, and the muscle in his jaw twitches. That’s when I feel it.
Feelhim.
His hard length is nestled between my thighs, his sweatpants doing little to act as a barrier between us.
My heart races faster, and this time, it has nothing to do with adrenaline and everything to do with him.
My throat bobs as I grab his wrists. Disappointment flashes across his face for a split second, but he doesn’t stop me.
My tongue darts out, sliding over my lower lip as I lift his hands over his head and pin them to the mat. His eyes narrow in confusion. “What?—”
