He grunts and shakes his head with a small smile before he strides toward the front door. He turns before he opens it. “It’s good to have you back. Both of you.”
I suspect what he means by that last statement is that Hayes hasn’t been the same since I left. Since I ran.
The urge to run is still strong within me, but when the door closes behind Ash, and I stare up at Hayes, the urge to run eases.
“Are you ready?” he asks, and there’s a dark heat in his eyes.
“For what?”
“For Hedon and your date with the Sybian Saddle.”
My core clenches, but my worry spikes. “We shouldn’t go out in public and be seen together.”
He wraps his hands around my waist, pulling me flush against him. “No one will know it’s us. I have different masks for both of us.”
“We could just continue my exploration of kinky, hedonistic sex here,” I try to reason, but deep down, I want the environment Hedon provides. I want to fully immerse myself in exploring this part I’ve repressed and denied.
And maybe a part of me wants to test Hayes and his reaction if that red-headed bombshell is there.
Does he truly not care about her? Does he truly want me over her or any other woman in that club?
My old insecurities—ones that, in hindsight, I see Guerilla always nurtured, even before I became his old lady—rear their ugly heads.
Hayes’s brow furrows as he stares down at me, almost like he’s reading my mind.
I smile up at him. “Okay, let’s go to Hedon. But only if you think it doesn’t put you at risk.”
“Siren.” It’s the hedonistic sex god who gives me a sinister smile, no longer my beloved best friend. “I’m a criminal; I’m always at risk. And there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to keep you safe. Trust me.”
And I do.
So I nod and slip my hand into his.
Chapter 36
Army
I’vedamnedmyself.
Leeva in the dress I bought for her… Pure perfection. Pure sin.
Gauzy panels of fabric drape from her shoulders to the floor, secured at her waist with a belt. Everything important is covered from prying eyes.
And the eyes at Hedon are prying. Anytime I look away from her, I find multiple people are staring openly at my siren.
The dress is crimson and matches her lipstick. And I can’t wait to see that lipstick smeared as she takes my cock deep in her throat like a good fucking girl while she rides the Sybian Saddle. I get hard just thinking about how I’ll wrench orgasm after orgasm from her until she’s sobbing my name and begging me to come all over her.
I love coming all over her skin, and Ilovethat she loves it, too.
Although I’d love to fuck her bare and come deep inside her. But as much as I want that—and dare to hope that I’ll survive so I can have a future with Leeva where she’s the mother of my children—I’d never use her lust to convince her.
I know the emotional and mental anguish she experiences, fearing getting pregnant again and losing a child. And the fact that she’s started to let me finger-fuck my cum after I’ve spurted it onto her skin is a small step. She’s on birth control, so logically she’s protected from getting pregnant right now, but I know when it comes to fear, logic and reason aren’t always driving the actions.
So for now, I’m happy to wear a condom and come all over her skin until she’s ready for more.
We’re in the main room of Hedon, and I sit in a wingback chair, pulling Leeva onto my lap.
She turns to give me a questioning look. Her beautiful amber eyes shine through the pale-gold mask that covers her entire face. It’s designed with delicate vines and flowers, etched with subtle cracks and shadows—innocence, with just a hint of darkness, the perfect blend of my little dove and my siren. Her dark hair is unbound, and she looks exquisite. Ravishing.
