I wrapped my arms around myself as I shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never had a real relationship before. I dinna know what to expect.”
“Well let’s start with this.” Evan drew closer to me, crossing his arms over his chest. “It means that if ye think I’m gonna let you go with them, run away, or break things off because ye think it’s the best way to keep us safe, then we’re about to have a real fucking problem.”
I bit my lip. I really shouldn’t press this, but it wasn’t like I had the filter to stop it. “You can’t deny that it’s an option. Shouldn’t we be looking at everything that’s on the table?”
“That’s not a fucking option,” Evan growled. His bones snapped, but I wasn’t afraid. Evan would never hurt me. “Anything that puts you at risk isnot a fucking option.”
“Evan, you have to think about what matters. The clan, the life and community you’ve all built here, that’s what matters. Yourlifeis what matters.”
“You matter!” His roar was so loud that the walls shook. “You fucking matter, Reid. You.”
Why wasn’t he seeing this from my point of view? I knew he loved me—why, I had no idea—but I was just a human. My life was just a blip on the radar compared to his. “I’m not worth it.”
“Sweetheart”—His voice gentled as he cupped my face—“this is your trauma and fear talking. Believe me, you’re wortheverything.It’s not just me who thinks so, either, or did you miss the fact that every single member of the inner circle thinks the same? They mean it too, Reid. They want tokeep you safe because you’re part of our clan, and we protect our own.”
I squeezed my eyes shut. Fuck, how I wished that were the case. I wished desperately that I’d been born here instead.
But I hadn’t.
“What if I insist on leaving?” I said finally, needing to know what he’d say. If all his talk about me not being trapped here was just that—talk. “Would ye let me go?”
He exhaled slowly, his eyes briefly closing. When they opened, the resignation there cracked my heart. “Aye, Reid. I would. I made ye a promise that you’d never be held prisoner here, and I’d stand by that.”
Something in me eased even as a foul taste filled my mouth. How had I doubted Evan for even a second? What the fuck was wrong with me?
“We can leave now, if ye like,” Evan said. “I’d ask that you give me a couple of hours to say my goodbyes, but then we can go.”
My brain screeched to a halt. “What?”
“I canna just leave without saying anything,” he said, rubbing my shoulders. “But I won’t take long, and then we can be on our way.”
“Onourway?” My voice was so high pitched it didn’t sound like my own. “As in, you’d come with me?”
“Aye. I’m not letting ye go without me, Reid. Especially not with the Clarksons breathing down yer neck.” He smiled tightly. “I can take care of us if they come calling.”
“No.” I shook my head as I stepped back. “No, Evan.”
He frowned. “Ye don’t need to worry, Reid. I know you’ve only seen me in action once, but I’m more than capable of protecting us both.”
“That’s not what I mean,” I yelled, flinging my arm outin the direction of the clan. “Ye can’t leave them, Evan. They’re your family. Your home. This is your life here. What the fuck are you thinking?”
Evan closed the distance between us, his hands going to my hips. “I’m thinking that you’re my home now, Reid. You’re my life. Yes, it’d hurt to leave, but I’d do it if ye asked me. I’d follow ye anywhere.”
“I love you,” I blurted out.
A smile dawned on his face, brighter than any sunrise. “Ye do?”
I nodded rapidly. “Aye. I do. I really fucking do. I love you.”
He whooped, and suddenly I was lifted off my feet. A surprised laugh burst from me as he crushed me to his body.
“I’m so happy ye love me,” Evan said, finally putting me down. “Being in love fucking rocks.”
“It does.” I reached up to touch his chin. “I don’t want us to leave, Evan.”
“You don’t?”
“No.” Tears blurred my vision. “I’d never ask that of ye, Evan. Never.”
