The look on his face was one of disgusting surprise – not at her, but at Liam.
“The fuck did he tell you?”
“Something I’ve managed to put together for myself as well. You’ve been cryptic about the real reason behind your divorce, but now I figured it out. You came out to her, and she freaked.”
“It’s not that simple. Our marriage was on life support before that. It was just the straw that broke that camel’s back.”
“Sydney’s a good woman,” Benson insisted. “She was just in way over her head at the end of our relationship. I sprang so much on her. I doubt my… predilections… were a surprise.”
“She rejected you, though. I’m not.”
Benson still couldn’t bring himself to look at her, so Eden placed both hands on his cheeks, her thumbs pressing into the dimples beneath his eyes.
“It took a long time,” Benson muttered, “to be honest with myself.”
She didn’t say anything.
“I grew up in a world where you just didn’t do that, no matter how you felt. Other guys, maybe even your buddies, could be gay, butyou?No way. And things were very either-or. There was no liking both shit. I bet it was different for you.”
Eden maintained her silence. It was better for him to let it out.
“If a guy liked girls, he just went with it. So, that’s what I did. Maybe things would have been different if Sydney hadn’t gotten pregnant, but she did, and that’s where my life went.”
“You had to be a family man.”
“Yeah. Family men don’t hook up with other guys at parties. Let alone with their wives.”
“I’m sorry, Ben.”
“Yeah, well, as you’ve surmised, she knew something was up and probably wasn’t shocked when I came out to her. But I think she was expecting me to be gay. Then, when Liam came around, she was even more confused. She almost took me to court to get full custody.”
“I’m really sorry.”
“But my daughter was old enough, it didn’t matter, I guess. She’s a smart girl. She figured out her old man as soon as she was in middle school. Said there were like five bi boys in her class. Can you imagine?”
“Not really. I mean, in middle school?”
“Times change, angel.”
“I wish you could have grown up in those times, Ben.”
“Well, I didn’t. So now I get to be in therapy about it.”
She braved hugging him, offering her weight, her warmth to him. Benson wasn’t the kind to use a lot of words in these situations, so for him to saythismuch must have been exhausting.I just need him to know that I don’t hate him. I don’t judge him.
Instead, he brought up something else.
“You don’t think I’m disgusting, do you?”
Eden was so caught off guard that it took her a moment to realize what he meant. “What? No. Why would I think that?”
“Because…” Benson tensed beneath her hold.
“It’s what Sydney said, isn’t it?”
“She said it made her completely rethink our marriage, never mind my love for sharing her with other men. I admit it, angel, that was a bit of a stepping stone for me to explore my sexuality, but I purposely did itwithher because Ilovedher. I trusted her.”
“Ben…”
