“I’m sorry, Maisie. So sorry.” He’s said it already, but the repetition is what I need to hear. He continues to say it, even when he doesn’t have to.
We must look like fools to anyone around us. But I can’t bring myself to care.
“Why?” is all I can ask. My voice is as raw as the emotions inside of me.
He swallows. “You ... chose someone else.”
I tug away, a frown forming on my features. “I didnot?—”
“Maisie,” he says it calmly, but firmly. “You were with Rob. That changed things.”
“It didn’t have to.”
“Yes, it did. Rob was never okay with how close we are. No one else either. And I didn’t know how to stop other than ... stopping it altogether.”
What he said makes sense logically. But I can’t wrap my head aroundanyonebeing important enough to come between us. “But you’re my friend. That’s important to me.”
“And we’ve always been that. Just with ... space.”
My heart tells me that I don’t want space. I’ve never wanted space. Not from him.
“Is there some happy medium we can find?”
He blinks. “I don’t know. The issue with me and you is that I don’t think either of us knows when we go too far.”
The words make my breath catch in my throat and I wonder if everyone else has been right the entire time. Is there something more between us?
I open my mouth to ask him just that. But then it closes before I can. Things go wrong. If me asking him if there was anything more ruined our friendship, it would be like the feelings I just felt, except so much worse.
I want to be brave so badly, but I can’t let things fall apart between us. Not after what’s just happened.
“Okay.” The word hurts, but I say it anyway.
Nate frowns. “Okay?” he repeats. “What does that mean?”
“It means I get it. This may not be what I want, but that’s okay.”
“And what do you want, Maisie?”
“Anything you’re willing to give me.” It’s true. I’d take being one inch closer to him than where we were before.
Nate’s jaw drops. “Are you serious? Maisie, I don’t think you know what you’re asking for.”
“I do know.”
“No, you really don’t.”
“You wanna touch me, right?” I ask. He blinks and his ears go red, but he nods. “Then do it.”
“What happens when I go too far?”
“I think it’ll probably be me who goes too far.” And it’s true. With all the things I’ve thought about him, I wonder if platonic touches willeverbe enough.
“Don’t challenge me,” he says lowly. “This’ll be the one you’d lose.”
I know I’m the one losing here, so I only shrug. “It’s better than you acting like I burn you every time we touch.”
“That’s not ... entirely inaccurate,” he says, eyes going distant as he thinks about it. Then he focuses back on me.
