Eleanor met my anger with her own, fire and frustration in her eyes, voice rising, so even the men outside would hear. “I don’t need your protection! I’m not a child anymore, Adelia. When are you going to realize that?”
Shock held me frozen in place. She never yelled at me. Ever.
In all the times we’d argued, even in her most stubborn years, she had never raised her voice to me. The boiling rage burning moments ago soured in my stomach. I shouldn’t have taken my own frustrations out on her. It wasn’t her fault.
“I do—”
“No, you don’t. You keep things from me you think I can’t handle. Gods, last night you had me spirited away because you think I’m too young, tooinnocent.You’re my sister, and I’m grateful for everything you’ve done since Mom and Dad died, but at some point, you need to realize I’m not a little kid anymore. You deserve to have a life too.” Her eyes glistened with unshed tears, chest heaving in wake of her admission.
I had no words. She wasn’t just upset at me for keeping her in the dark, but because I was so obviously doing something I didn’t want to. All in the name of her protection.
Silence stretched between us. There was nothing I could say to make this right, certainly not the truth. I couldn’t drop that epiphany after everything she said. When I didn’t respond to her words, Eleanor shook her head and stormed away, past a concerned Shade, who had taken several steps closer, and slammed the greenhouse door in her wake, the glass rattling.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered too late. Tears spilled over my cheeks, then I collapsed in on myself.
What have I done?
Smoky tendrils curled along the stone floor accompanied by soft footfalls. Shade wrapped me in his arms, hugging me close and encompassing me in his purloe scent. I shouldn’t, but I nuzzled into his chest, inhaling deeply to calm my tumultuous thoughts. The weight of this secret was suffocating, along with my warring thoughts and feelings.
My mother’s words echoed again.Only when she is ready, Adelia, not before.
How was I supposed to know when she was ready? She certainly thought she was, and every move I made pushed her further away, a noose tightening each time I denied her. If I kept going, it would surely kill me.
I didn’t know how she would react when I told her the truth, or who she would tell. She couldn’t possibly understand how precarious our situation was, what lengths others would go to, or the need to keep her protected.
The weight of it all was too much, eating away at my resolve. I needed to release some of it, clear the burden so I could keep stepping forward. If only someone else knew the truth, someone who could be trusted and help carry the burden. My spiraling thoughts paused.
Maybe someone did?
I stared at the swirling marks along Shade’s neck. Shade, who had only shown deference to Eleanor and hadn’t questioned my need to keep her safe, even above my own life.
I pulled back, staring into startlingly gray eyes. “You know.”
His gaze grew serious and understanding, then he nodded once. “I knew the first time I met her, could sense it in her blood. She is the last true heir of the Emyrdeis line.”
My chest was a conflict of emotions, constricting fear and satisfying relief. Relief I was no longer alone, that someone could help shoulder the burden of truth.
Fear.
Fear others would find out, others who would be a threat to her.
“She is,” I whispered, admitting the truth aloud for the first time since I read my mother’s words eight years ago. I rested my forehead against his shoulder, closing my eyes as I tried to sort through the storm battering in my chest.
“But not you.” A statement, not a question. When I opened my eyes again, he was watching me carefully, curiously.
“She is my sister in every way but by blood. My birth mother was the best friend of the woman who raised me; she took me in when both my parents died.”
“Eleanor doesn’t know.” Another statement, one I scoffed at, the bitterness following our parents’ deaths rising to the surface.
“I didn’t either. Not until mymothertold me while she choked on her own blood.”
Despite her words that day, I still made the promise to keep Eleanor safe, and I had done so, even though she lied to me my entire life. Because I loved her, even if it was clouded in hate.
The letter she left only gave me some truths. Not enough to answer all the questions I had about my true parents, about what my life could have been. Only to keep Eleanor safe and wait until she was ready to give her the truth about her destiny. Adeep sigh escaped me, the weight of my mother’s deception and commands heavy again. “She deserves a chance to live a little while. Experience what it is to be normal before she is burdened with responsibility.”
Shade’s eyes hardened slightly. “Should that be her choice?”
I jerked out of his touch at the accusatory tone. “My parents were murdered because of the blood that ran in my father’s veins. No one else knows who she is. If Terym or even King Siro were to find out, she would meet the same end. I’ll do anything, give anything, to keep her safe.”
