“I don’t think I said it,” she says shyly, her eyes dropping to her drink. “I’m Louisa.” Her blonde hair falls past her shoulders, and while it’s not quite as light as Brittany’s, it’s still pretty.
Wait … why am I comparing Louisa to Brittany?
I stop my thought right in its tracks, confusion filling my chest. I mean, yeah, I think Brittany is gorgeous, and I could easily obsess over her—but she’s off-limits. And besides, she’s moved on with her life and is back to having nothing to do with us.
“What do you do for work?” Louisa asks, her bright red lips turning slightly upward.
“I work as a senior software engineer.” I wait for her to have some sort of response, but I get nothing. Usually, women are a little more impressed—at least by the wordsenior.I swallow the knot in my throat that’s starting to form. “What do you do for work?”
“I’m a pediatric surgeon at the regional hospital.”
Oh dang. No wonder I’m not impressive to her.
“That’s really awesome,” I say, nearly choking on air as I pick up my water to take a sip. “I bet that’s really rewarding work.”
“Oh yeah, it is,” she says, still spinning her glass in her hands. “It’s also pretty demanding. I moved here almost a year ago, and this is my first night out. I don’t think I’m gonna have a lot of time to date.”
“Because you’re busy saving lives,” I point out. “That basically makes you superhuman.”
She laughs, her eyes lighting up as they meet mine. “Oh yeah, definitely. I’ll take that. You build software though, that’s pretty cool, too.”
“Well, I don’t think it’s remotely in the same league, but I’ll take it. Thank you.” The playback of her own words has her grinning, and I feel a burst of pride in my chest. There’s something about making someone feel good that makesmefeel good—even if I’m not sure there’s any chemistry between us.
You have to give her a chance,I inwardly chide myself. I’ve been too caught up in thoughts of Brittany when I should be focused on literallyanyoneelse.
Brittany’s the one woman I can’t have, so I need to get her out of my brain.
And replace her with Louisa?
Something about that feels all wrong, but I let it go and do my best to focus on the conversation.
“So, are you from New York City?” she asks, leaning her elbow against the table. I can’t tell if she’s bored or if she’s just nota high-energy person. I mean, surgeons probably shouldn’t be bouncing off the wall with energy…
“I’m actually from California,” I tell her, without specifyingwherein California. It doesn’t matter usually. Everyone assumes whatever they’re going to about the Golden State anyway.
“I’m from Nevada.” She gives me a smile, resting her cheek against her hand. “I guess we’re kind of neighbors. What brought you to New York?”
“School,” I tell her, and then go into the story of how I came here, how I met Parker, and how I got my start at the company with him. She listens intently the entire time, and while I enjoy the way she’s paying attention…
I just don’tfeelanything about the conversation.
There’s no butterflies.
I return the question, and she breaks into an elaborate story about college and medical school, her residency in Pennsylvania, and then finally landing her dream job there in the city. It’s impressive, and I nod along to be respectful, but I can’t deny the fact thatIstart to feel a little bored.
And that makes me feel awful.
“I’m surprised you haven’t found someone yet,” Louisa comments, picking up her near-empty water glass to drink the final contents. “You seem like a really awesome person.”
“Thank you, I have to say the same for you.” As I say the words though, they don’t feel like they’re as authentic as they should be.
What is wrong with me? Louisa is an awesome woman. She’s a total catch.
“I think I should probably go wander around and chat with everyone,” she says suddenly, and I can’t help but wonder if she can read the expression on my face. The thought is embarrassing, and I quickly slide off the stool.
“For sure, I probably should do the same.” I reach for my mostly-full water, sliding it toward me so I can carry it. However, as soon as I connect with the glass, the condensation on the outside causes it to slip.
And I fumble it.Bad.
