I took a breath in, held it, and finally pressed the call button.
He answered on the second ring.
“Soph, are you okay?”
The nickname landed heavier than it should have. Only two people in the world had ever called me that—my cousin, and later Jonathan. I’d never minded it before, had even found comfort in the familiarity.
But now it tugged at something raw, and for a brief, irrational moment, I wondered why Jonathan hadn’t come up with a new nickname, something that belonged only to us. Kind of like Kian withzemër.
“Soph?” Kristoff repeated, reminding me that I’d been the one to call.
“Hey.” I pinched the bridge of my nose, squeezing my eyes shut as if my thoughts might finally stop spiraling. I pushed away the comparison—Jonathan and Kian were nothing alike. Not even close.
“Kian told me he…” My voice faltered, the words refusing to line up. Guilt pressed against my chest, thick and suffocating. “I’m so sorry, Kristoff,” I blurted. “I wouldn’t blame you if you and Gemma never wanted to see me again. I’m so?—”
“Hey. Hey… Stop and listen to me now.” His voice sharpened, cutting through my apology. “You have nothing to apologize for. This is on Jacqueline. That spiteful, crazy bitch.”
His bluntness surprised me, but it didn’t ease the knot in my throat.
“But if I hadn’t insisted on uncovering what really happened to Jonathan,” I croaked, the words tasting wrong even as I said them, “she wouldn’t have taken Sienna.”
I sat on the floor, its hardwood cool against my skin.
“And if I hadn’t married her before my deployment,” he shot back, just as quickly, “she wouldn’t be in our lives at all.” He exhaled hard, the sound rough in my ear. “We could go round and round like this forever, Soph. But I can promise you, you’re the least to blame here. This is on me, on Jonathan, and mostly on Jacqueline.”
I stared at the far wall, its edges blurring as my eyes burned. His logic made sense. I knew that. I just couldn’t make my heart accept it.
“Then why can’t I shake off this feeling of guilt?” I asked, forcing a brittle laugh out. “No matter what I tell myself, it’s still there.”
“Because you’re compassionate and you love Sienna,” he stated matter-of-factly. “I bet Jacqueline isn’t losing sleep over her actions toward you or even the fact that she murdered Jonathan.”
“So you believe me?”
“I do. There’d be no reason for her to threaten you and hurt my kid otherwise. I’m in contact with the authorities, but for some godforsaken reason they’re dragging their feet. But she will pay.”
I swallowed. “Kian said he’s hunting her down.”
“Yes.” My cousin never lied.
“And you trust him?”
“I do.”
“Do you know who he is?” I asked slowly, a part of me not wanting to betray Kian. Or maybe I was simply protecting myself because I was under his roof. “What he does?”
He chuckled. “I do, but there’s nobody I trust more, which I guess is ironic.”
“So you know…” I trailed off.
“That he’s the head of the Albanian mafia and Brazilian cartel? Yes, I do.”
“Geez, Kristoff,” I muttered. “What kind of friends do you have?”
“The kind that would stop at nothing to protect you.” There wasn’t an ounce of hesitation in his voice. “Kian Cortes got Autumn Ashford out of Afghanistan,” he continued. “He’s helped a lot of people who had no other way out.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I don’t give a crap about the labels or the rumors. The bottom line is this: he’s a good man. And those are rare these days.”
“So you’re telling me to trust him,” I said slowly.
“Yes, I am. I’m also telling you to stay under his protection until we get Jacqueline behind bars.”
