This is a bad idea.
A really,reallybad idea.
I tracked Charlie down straight after Kohen dragged me into the kitchenette yesterday, and typed up a message to Kiervan saying I had worries about Kohen I wanted to discuss. The response came back in a matter of seconds, and there was no going back from there.
He’s traveling five hours to see me even though I insisted we communicate by phone. It would have been a one-minute call where I tell him to fuck off and leave Kohen alone. He’s been there forme since day one, and I want to have his back too. Lord knows I’ve screwed Kohen over enough times, and I have every intention of evening the scales.
There’s no going back after this, and no way of seeing the sunlight if things take a turn for the worst. There’s another thing on my mind—a niggly little feeling that’s wormed its way down to my chest and hasn’t left since yesterday afternoon. It spreads warmth to my fingertips and the very ends of my toes. It’s as if I finally know what sunlight feels on my skin after watching from the shade my whole life.
Knowing that I’m truly wanted is a heady feeling that makes me want to laugh and cry at the same time. The pieces were falling into place as I lay in bed last night. Kohen did everything he said he would, and I didn’t need to ask.
And maybe, justmaybe, when I die, I’ll still remember what being cared for feels like. I push my back against the brick building, hoping it will swallow me whole. It’s getting incrementally harder to breathe with the weight of regret on my chest. Seconds feel like hours as I mentally gnaw on the bars of my cage until Ifinallysee him. It was impulsive and stupid, and I wish I could take it back, but now he’s here. I stayed up all night practicing what I would say to him. Now that he’s in front of me, I can’t remember why I invited him to begin with.
The other Osman.
Kiervan.
He’s impeccably dressed in a T-shirt and blazer combination. The soft black curls at the top of his head bounce with his stride up the steps from the car park. His stature is slightly smaller than Kohen’s, but he puffs his chest out like he’s double the size. When his sightsland on me, he draws his wide smile like it’s a weapon, and I finally see the inky darkness beneath the mask.
How did I not notice it before? I’ve seen what it looks like when someone gets close to the grave. He’s got the look of someone drugged up on a cocktail of everything they could get their hands on; I can tell by the rot hiding beneath his smile.
There’s the slightest swagger in his step as he advances towards me. The smile he gives me is meant to be friendly and disarm me like it does to everyone else, but there’s nothing natural about it. I may not have the best survival responses, but I know for a fact he is a threat.
And I just invited the demon into my home.
Kohen may never forgive me for approaching his brother without telling him. He may not fully understand why I’m doing it, but at least one person will be in my corner if things go south. It makes my chest warm knowing that I have someone watching my back.
Yesterday, I started probing for details about everything he’s had to do for Kiervan: taking the fall for Kiervan’s drugs, always sitting a grade below Kiervan in each class they both took, doing his share of the chores, being his alibi, acting as his punching bag, and so much more. And Kohen withstood all of it just to protect me from his family.
Kiervan’s canines peek through as his smile broadens, waving at me like we’re old friends catching up after years. “Hey, Blaze,” he says once he’s at the corner of the brick building I’ve chosen for our meeting spot. It’s hidden enough that someone will only see us if they come from the car park. “How’ve you been? It’s been, what, like, three years?”
“Cut the shit. I know you’re faking it, you goddamn psychopath.” I cross my arms so my fidgeting hands don’t give me away. His eyes catch the movement, and the smile the psychopath wears morphs into a beast’s with a mouth full of razor-sharp teeth ready to rip my throat out. But his eyes change to something eerily familiar; it’s the same analytical stare Kohen has every time he’s cataloging a new piece of information.
Kiervan stops for a second. Just long enough to make my heart pound against my ribs, screaming it’s time for me to take flight. His lips twist to the side as if he’s decided this is a game he can’t wait to play.
“Didn’t anyone ever teach you not to poke a bear?” There’s truth to the way his eyes morph into maliciousness as he cocks his head like he’s a hunter who’s just found his prey. He stalks forward, and it takes every ounce of my being not to bolt or tell him I was wrong and there was no reason for him to come all the way out here.
I swallow the lump in my throat and jerk my chin up. “I was willing to do it over the phone; you’re the one who decided to drive out to see me.”
He shrugs innocently. “Your text made it sound so urgent. I’m just trying to be a good brother and watch out for the little guy.”
“Really? You mean it? You want what’s best for him?” Of course, he doesn’t. That doesn’t mean I don’t want him to say it.
“Of course.” His brows dip down, and he holds a hand over his heart in fake earnest. “He’s family. I always want what’s right for them.”
“Then get your slimy claws out of him and fuck right off,” I hiss.
The laughter that ripples through the air sends goosebumps raining over my skin.
Oh, I fucked up. Bad.
“No wonder he likes you.” I swat Kiervan's hand away when he pinches my cheek. “You’re so cute when you act so dumb. It’s like a match made in heaven,” he muses. “Darling, pray tell, where exactly did my brother claim my claws are? And don’t skimp out on the details. I like to be thorough.” The piece of shit backs me up against the wall, and I suck in a sharp breath when he leans his hand against the brick above my head.
He’s a bully. An abuser. Plain and simple.
I square my shoulders even though I want to knee him in the family jewels, then crutch away as fast as I can. “Well, I heard that you haven’t got all that much going on up here.” I tap my temple. “And you need your little baby brother to do all your dirty work for you.”
His eyes harden. “Is that so?”
