But they just kept bickering as if she weren’t even there. As if this entire thing didn’t revolve around her. Like a couple of little boys on the playground.
Unbelievable.Testosterone overload at its finest.
She rolled her eyes and set her own mug on the table. Lifting her fingers, she placed them in her mouth and blew hard. The piercing whistle shut both men up and their attention snapped over to her.
She met each of their slightly surprised looks and placed her hands on her hips. “That’s more like it. Considering I am an integral part of this conversation, I’d appreciate it if you’d allow me to speak.”
“I think you should go to your room,” Xander growled.
Oh, no he did not.Anger at being so easily dismissed bubbled up inside her. Crossing her arms, defiant as hell, hackles raised, she shook her head. “Absolutely not.”
“Essie—” Xander’s warning tone infuriated her more.
“Let her stay,” Brand interrupted. “Maybe she wants to understand what the hell is happening just as much as I do. Because you’re a hard motherfucker to read, Hawke. Starting with the moment you reached out to Julia about Mitch.”
“Who is Mitch?” Essie asked.
“General Mitchell Evans is my fiancée’s father. When he went missing last year, a mysterious informant—Xander—contacted Julia with his location. We met him down in Mexico for more details. We got Mitch out, but then the Lazaro Cartel came back and kidnapped Julia.” Brand turned his full attention back to Xander. “The op went south fast until Xander conveniently appeared out of nowhere,helpingus.”
“Helpingmyself,” Xander corrected coolly.
“I always wondered why you didn’t let me kill Lazaro,” Brand murmured thoughtfully. “Why the hell you blocked my shot.”
“Because I wanted to know where his second-in-command was hiding,” Xander stated. “And I couldn’t interrogate him if you killed him.”
“Barrera,” Brand realized. “Hell, Hawke, I think you did a little more than ask Lazaro questions. If I recall correctly, you had his finger on a string around your neck.”
Oh, God.Essie had never known who was responsible for murdering Fernando Lazaro. Who had sliced the drug lord to ribbons. Her fingers tightened on her cross.
“Lazaro was my one shot to ferret out Barrera, and I took it. And, yeah, I used my switchblade to get answers. If you think I regret one slash, you’d be wrong. I happily cut him up and chopped off his goddamn finger.”
For a long moment, no one said anything.
“Chaz thinks you keep it in your freezer,” Brand said flatly.
Essie’s eyes darted to the kitchen appliance. If anything would be cursed, it would be Fernando Lazaro’s finger.
“I burned it,” Xander seethed. “I happily watched the flesh melt off the bone and turn to ash.”
Her heart thumped harder, stomach curdling. She could only imagine what he had planned for José.
“Why?” Brand demanded through gritted teeth, leaning forward, but Xander clamped his mouth shut.
His friends didn’t know about his sister.
Surprise flashed through her. Why had he confided in her but not them? Confusion and empathy swirled within her as he looked over at her, his dark blue eyes so… lost. Full of anguish. Her heart clenched.Poor Xander.She wanted to reach out to him, but he needed more than that. He needed his revenge. Without it, he’d never find peace.
“Tell me, Hawke!” Brand demanded, voice raising. “What the fuck is this all about?”
Xander wrenched his gaze from Essie’s, turned his full attention back to Brand and barked, “Because José Barrera raped and murdered my baby sister!”
Brand swore under his breath. Essie could see every muscle in the man’s body tighten before he dropped back against the cushion. Beside her, Xander’s shoulders hunched. He rested his arms on his thighs and bowed his head, not making eye contact with either of them while he continued his story.
“When I was deep undercover with the CIA, my job was to destroy the Lazaro Cartel. Barrera found out and kidnapped Alyssa, killing her as a warning to me.” Xander’s eyes slid shut, his heartache so strong it was palpable. “Alyssa is gone because I couldn’t do the only job a big brother is supposed to do—protect his sister.” His chin dropped to his chest, and she could feel the waves of guilt radiating off him.
Essie’s heart cracked and bled. Damn José and his lust for power.
Sliding off the sofa, Essie went down to her knees and moved between Xander’s sprawled legs. His head lifted in surprise, tortured blue eyes meeting hers, as she laid her hands on top of his knees. His attention focused fully on her. A spark sizzled to life, and she wondered if it was because she was on her knees before him. But then it burned out, and she had a feeling it had to do with Brandon watching them so closely.
