“Why do I feel like you’re not being completely honest with me? Or yourself?” he added in a low voice.
Time to go.“Thanks for coming down to get us, Brand. I’ll be in touch.”
Before Brand could comment, Xander hopped out. The Motley Crew’s leader sometimes had a tendency to act like the big boss Delta Force operator he used to be. And Xander didn’t need a lecture, or anyone telling him what to do. He’d make his own piss-poor decisions on his own, thank you very much. At least then he could only blame himself when everything went to shit.
Essie followed him up to the front door, uncharacteristically quiet, watching as he tapped in a code on the lock pad. It felt like forever since he’d been home, and he was really looking forward to a long, hot shower and a proper dinner. The door swung open to reveal a dark, gloomy, dusty and very chilly house. But anything was better than the dank cell he’d spent way too long inside.
He turned to Essie who looked around with wide eyes. “I don’t spend a lot of time here, so it is what it is.” That was a bit of an understatement. In the last six months, he’d spent maybe four weeks total there. Cielo Springs had turned out to be a great small town to lay low, and after hooking up with Brand and the others, he’d decided to purchase a place under an alias.
“It’s fine,” she instantly responded. “Just a little cold.”
Xander walked over and flipped on the heat. “It’ll warm up soon. End of February in Cielo Springs isn’t exactly sandal weather like down in Mexico.” He studied her for a long moment. “Are you planning on running?”
She shook her head. “I have nowhere to go at present.”
“Good. Because I need a long, hot shower and I’d rather not have to lock you up like a prisoner.” He locked eyes with her. “Fair warning, Cielo Springs is Small Town, USA. You can’t disappear into a crowd here. The people who live here are loyal and very observant. If you do run, I’ll find you. And there will be consequences.”
She seemed about to respond but then thought better of it.
“There’s a guestroom down the hall on the right with its own bathroom.” He nodded toward a hallway. “Make yourself at home. I’m going to clean up and then we can order some dinner.”
“Okay.”
Turning on his heel, he walked down to his bedroom. He felt dirty and itchy, and he couldn’t wait to strip off the filthy clothes he’d been wearing for way too long. Sure, he’d washed them, but a dirty sink and a practically new washing machine were entirely different. And that half-ass bath in the river? Seeing Essie practically naked had definitely made him feel way dirtier.
The moment he stepped into his room, he yanked his T-shirt over his head. After kicking his boots off, he shucked his cargo pants and boxer briefs and walked naked into the attached bathroom. Before stepping into the shower, he caught a glimpse of his reflection in the mirror and froze, barely recognizing himself.
Wow.He looked like a pile of dogshit left out to bake in the summer sun. Lifting a hand, he ran it through his too-long, shaggy hair and then over his beard. He looked like a freaking mountain man. Hell, he looked like Corey before the guy met Sera and became half-civilized. Half because, well, the man might have a bride, but he still lived in the woods with a wolf.
And Essie—Estrella—had kissed him looking like this? Clearly, the woman had very low standards.
Time to do some grooming. He couldn’t wait to shave and brush his teeth until his gums bled.
Xander flipped the water on, spun the dial all the way over and stepped beneath the spray.Fuck yeah.Nothing had felt so good in so long. Well, except for Essie’sbody arching beneath him, her mouth open and her tongue sliding against his.
He gave his head a hard shake, sending water droplets flying.Forget her, Hawke.She wasn’t his Essie. She was Estrella Barrera. A pawn in his game with her brother. Albeit a lovely one, but still just a tool that would help him achieve his long-sought vengeance.
Soaping up, he scrubbed every corner until he was squeaky clean. Then he went over every inch of his body one more time. His thoughts inevitably returned to his gorgeous houseguest and his dick grew hard. So much for forgetting her. He grabbed his traitorous cock and pumped it. Rough and fast, until he was coming hard, and his release splattered against the tiles.
He slapped a hand against the cool wall, dropping his chin to his chest, breaths sawing in and out. “Fuck,” he growled. Why did he feel so conflicted? Yes, he was going to use Essie to kill her brother. But, at the same time, he wanted to strip her naked and fuck her until she was screaming his name.
A part of him also felt extremely protective when it came to her. When Lex had flirted with her, shaking her hand far too long while eye-fucking her a little too hard, it had pissed Xander off.Mine.The thought had flashed through his mind, and it had taken far too long for him to suppress it. She wasn’t his and she never would be.
Estrella Barrera was a means to an end.
He just needed to keep reminding himself of that fact.
Chapter thirteen
Xander left her standing there without a second glance as he moved down the hall. Essie figured if he was going to take a shower, she may as well do the same. He was right. Even if she wanted to run, she had nowhere else to go.
Washing off the jungle grime felt amazing. Sure, the quick cool-off and wash-up in the river had been nice—especially the company and view—but this was sublime. She stood beneath the spray far too long, letting the dirt and sweat wash down the drain as she contemplated everything that had happened.
She’d done it. Successfully ran away from her brother, escaping both marriage and Mexico. She was proud of herself for being so brave but now worry nipped at her. The future loomed, and she had no idea what to do. Saving some money and making her way to Tomás seemed the most logical thing, but it would take time. Other than the ruby rosary stashed in her backpack, she didn’t have a peso, er, penny to her name. Maybe she’d have to sell it.
But she couldn’t. It was the last piece she had of her mother.
Twisting the water from her long hair, she thought about the way Xander had referred to her as his ace. It made her nervous because she had no idea what was going on in his head. On the trip back to Montana, he’d turned quiet and contemplative, effectively shutting her out. If his plans turned nefarious, who would help her? Certainly not his friends. They’d be on his side.
