Laurel’s haunting eyes considered this and her expression went cold.
“Then what the hell was all of that in there?” She jabbed a finger toward the bedroom. “You told me I was safe with you. Why is that suddenly not true? What’s changed since then?”
“Everything,” I said with my voice raised, not meaning to match her intensity.
Fuck. Everything had changed.
I took a breath as I sifted through the competing thoughts in my mind. “No one will be looking for you in Munich,” I said. “Ifyou change your name and your appearance, you could probably keep dancing. You’d have to start from the bottom, but you could do it.”
I had no idea if this was true, but I hoped presenting her with this was enough to get her to agree, and the look on her face showed how tempting that idea was. The possibility that what she’d been wasn’t completely gone. Her shoulders rose as she took a deep breath and her gaze dropped to the hands I had on her.
“No. I want to stay here.”
Her soft voice made it unclear if she meant in this country, or right where she was now, in my hold. An odd, prickly sensation traveled up my body, warning me not to ask what I was about to.
“Why?” I gently grasped her chin and tilted it up, forcing her to look at me.
“Because I don’t know if I could be that far away from you.”
Hearing that made everything easier and so much harder. It was the exact same fear I had but couldn’t bring myself to say.
Too soon.
Too fast.
“And I’m not going to leave if my sister’s in danger,” she added. Her expression shifted to one of determination. “How quickly do you think he would come after me if I surfaced? How long would I have?”
When I first learned it was Frey, I’d thought about this option. We could draw him out into the open using her as bait, but it was incredibly dangerous. It wasn’t worth the risk of losing her, now more than ever.
“I don’t know, andwe’renot going to find out.” I put emphasis on it because I was just as much a part of this as she was now.
“I’m tired of him being in control. Everything we do is a reaction.” I knew what she really meant, how she felt helpless.
“No,” I snapped. “No,” I repeated, calmer.
“You’ll know he’s coming. It’s like I’d be bringing him right to you.”
“Goddamnit, no.”
“Why not?”
“Because!” I yelled it like I was a child. She stared at me, a pissed-off expression which told me that wasn’t a reason. I tried again, my voice reverting to a quieter, albeit shakier one. “Because I’m not ready.”
“Ready?”
I couldn’t find a way to express what I meant. I tried to put it together in my head but found only a jumble of words there and no coherent sentences... save one. Something I’d never said to anyone outside of family in my lifetime.
“I’m not ready,” I repeated, more for my benefit than hers. “We’ll know more when I call tomorrow.”
“Then I don’t see the point in having this conversation now.”
“Please, Laurel. I’m trying to keep you alive. I’m not trying to make you mad or send you away. I hope you know that.”
Her face didn’t change. “I’m fine.”
But my instincts issued a warning. When a woman saidfine, she really meant anything but that.
31
