“Use yours,” he snapped back. “Xeohr was working with her. The god of fucking tricks. He probably disguised himself to shove us in there.”
Kaden’s shoulders slumped, and he shook his head, his laugh bitter. He ran a hand over his brow, hissing slightly, and I knew that the wounds across his chest and abdomen were hurting him. “Is that what this is about? Are you still fucking looking to justify his abandonment of us?”
“We weren’t aban—”
“Stop!” Kaden raised his head, his crimson eyes flaring. “What do you think she did, huh? Made him what? Abandon us? Raise the one son he actually loved? Care for the only ones he considered family, and forget us? Do you think she has that much power? And even if all that is true, we were imprisoned for eons, Isaiah! Do you really think the most powerful god in history couldn’t have found us? If anything, it gave him an out, a final reason to be done with us, and I doubt he ever thought of us again.”
I waited for Isaiah to respond, to yell, to scream, but nothing came.
“I hate that even now, after everything, you still wish for a reason. He slapped us in the face with the reason. Why are you so desperate for an ounce of fucking love from him? He didn’t love us. He used us, and he left us. Just likeMera.” He said it mockingly before sighing. “Just let it fucking go.”
I knew they were monsters, beyond cruel and mean. I knew they’d hurt Cameron and Dianna, but I couldn’t help the burn in my eyes or the tears that fell. The things he’d said reminded me so much of my life with my mom. We had fled Jade City because of the abuse we’d endured, but they had hunted us down and dragged us back. I remembered being separated from her and never seeing her again. They had been so cruel, and I had felt so alone that there had been times I’d wished I’d never been born. After hearing what Kaden and Isaiah had gone through, I realized I had probably heard just a small part, and I wondered if they had wished for the same.
Dianna had once said that with my past, I could have turned mean, hateful, and cruel. She told me she admired me for choosing to be good, kind, and loving, for not forgetting how to smile, laugh, and care for others. I hadn’t really understood what she meant, but I thought I did now. We were all shaped by our experiences, but at some point, we had to decide what it made us, what kind of sharp instrument it turned us into. Perhaps true strength lies in the moments when the world tosses us into the fire and we emerge unscathed. Anger and hate came easily, but kindness after the world tried to break you was a mark of true strength.
I squared my shoulders and slipped from behind the tree, making some noise as I walked back into the cabin. Kaden sat, staring out into the dark forest. Isaiah was sitting up as well, but he’d turned away from Kaden with his head propped on his hand, staring daggers into the floor.
“I got the things I need for the salve,” I said. “Just give me a second.”
Neither said a word as I crushed the herbs and mixed them into a paste. I approached Isaiah first and gently removed his bandages. He barely looked at me as I cleaned and reapplied the salve before wrapping his wounds once more. Kaden sat up straighter as I approached him, and I could see the wince he tried to hide as the wound in his abdomen pulled. That one had worried me, but they were both healing quicker than I thought they would. Especially since I didn’t have the correct ingredients, but I was happy nonetheless. The small candle I’d found flickered in the room as I cleaned Kaden up. As soon as I was done, they settled back on their makeshift cots and turned away from each other. An emotional wall had gone up between the two brothers, each fortifying it with stone after stone of pain and anger.
After disposing of the dirty bandages, I returned to find Kaden and Isaiah deeply asleep again. Good, they both needed the rest, and so did I. I walked to the tiny area I had made for myself and used some water to wash my hands. I sighed and tucked my hair back, weariness weighing on me. As I stoked the fire, nursing the small flame, movement from the broken window caught my attention. I jumped, but stifled my yelp. The bird made of midnight feathers watched me with pale eyes from the windowsill. It flicked its head toward Kaden, Isaiah, and then back to me. I am sure it was my imagination, but it seemed almost gleeful that I had listened and helped them. My heart pounded, and I pressed my hand against my chest. I hadn’t even heard its wings.
“Are you hungry?” I asked, but it only blinked at me.
I turned to pull the small bundle of stale bread and berries from my pack, but when I looked up, the bird had disappeared as silently as he had arrived.
36
SAMKIEL
Ipushed up on my elbows, trying to get air back into my lungs. I glanced past him, watching the portal close. My control of it had slipped when I’d hit the wall. Good, at least they’d be safe.
“So I take it you are Gathrriel?” I asked, pushing to my feet.
He stepped into the light, and his appearance surprised me. I had never seen a being like him. He was neither man nor beast, but a seamless melding of both. The spikes and horns were all Ig’Morruthen, but his features epitomized male perfection. His massive frame easily supported the ancient and heavy armor he wore, the scaled texture a work of art. He carried himself with self-assured pride, a being who knew his place in the world. Even if Dianna had not told me who he was, his power and scent alone would have told me that not only was he a pure-blooded Ig’Morruthen, but he was one of the first.
“I have plans for my retribution. How I will make gods beg for their end, fire to pelt the ground like rain, and blood to fill dry ravines like rivers, but I felt you before I could put any of them in motion,” he said, one clawed, gloved hand pointing to his chest. “This pull … it is beyond life. Beyond death, it seems. I see you clearly now. You are in her head, yet your name fails me.” His voice demanded attention. “Tell me, what is it?”
Hope flared in my heart. Even with him in control, she was still in there, especially if he could see me in her memories. I had no reason to lie, and a part of me hoped that saying it would jar Dianna enough to regain control.
“Samkiel,” I called across the courtyard.
“I do not know of it.” No flicker of recognition sparked in his eyes, but his face spasmed with the smallest muscle twitch. “But she seems to.”
Elation filled me. I knew what I had to do just as before. I hope I didn’t die in the process. Gathrriel, unlike Dianna, would not hold back with me if we fought, but perhaps, if I could reach her in time, I could spare us all the bloodshed.
“I would like her back now, please. I am sure there is another you can use for your nefarious plans.”
“No.” That was all he said before he launched himself at me.
I flicked two of my rings, and silver armor slid over my body, protecting me from head to toe. A shimmering shield formed around me just before his fist slammed down against it. My legs buckled, and I dropped to one knee with enough force that the street cracked. He hit hard. The protective bubble continued to vibrate and ring, and I could see fissures forming over the iridescent surface.
Fuck.
On the plus side, my armor could take a beating. I had fought giants and beasts that had swallowed me whole, but my body within was not as durable. Gathrriel was going to beat me. Not because he was stronger or quicker or the rage he carried bested me, but because I’d never raise a hand to Dianna, and he currently had her body.
“I see you in my head now that I have control of her,” he said, prowling around me, assessing the shield. “Bits and pieces of the two of you on a loud, bright, foreign world. Fire and battles and clashes.” He closes his eyes and shakes his head as if trying to dislodge the memories from his mind. “The two intertwined.”
