In the morning when I awoke, my bower was curled and shriveled, the canopy overhead bare branches, and the petals of dead roses littered the floor.
Even in my sleep, poisonous turmoil welled inside me, and I had no idea how to keep Faery free from its effects.
Thirty-Four
How could I rule thisland when I could not even govern myself?
I would because I must. ’Twas compassion had made me a killer, and the mortal love I left behind still haunted my dreams.
But I alone remained of Queen Una’s line, and there was no one else who could take my place. The land had been without a ruler for years and, in the words of my chatelaine, it did not thrive.
In the morning it rained, pattered softly against the palace walls. The carnage of roses I dreamt up was quickly consumed by the carpet, and new blooms draped from the bedposts and canopy overhead.
Faery takes from death and returns beauty and life.
Mother Mab forfend that Faery should ever starve.
The rain pounded harder, and distant rumbles spoke of storms approaching. I wrapped my arms around myself and willed it all to go away. Willed myself to vanish, too, into Bess in Eamon’s household, forgotten by priest and family alike. She was weak, but at least she had her powers under control.
My chatelaine and I broke our fast together in my chambers, dining on bannocks sweet with honey and melting butter, jewellike fruits, and rich nectar. I bit into a plum dark as shadow, and the sweet juice ran down my chin.
“What a repast you serve,” I told Lileas. “I may never resort to pottage again.”
I will neverhaveto resort to pottage again.That was enough to put a smile on my face.
At my feet a circle of red campion flowers sprung up, curling around my ankles like an affectionate cat.
Lileas smiled and dabbed my lips with a silken napkin. “The land provides its bounty. It is—we all are—grateful you are here.”
Truly?My brow lifted.I brought the storm. Took the life of a fae without thinking.Branches blew in the wind outside, scraping against the palace walls.
Yet Lileas could not have spoken of Faery’s gratitude were it not true.
I took the napkin from her and wiped my mouth, gazing out the leafy window. Its pale green rendered the twilight sky a deep aqua, as if we swam together in some enchanted sea. Under Lileas’s gentle ministrations, my inner passions quieted, and the storm clouds disappeared.
“Truly, I could sit here all day.” I helped myself to another piece of fruit. It tasted of sweetness and content.
“You it is who controls the day.” Lileas smiled and nibbled upon berries that turned her soft lips red as a rose. “If you do not wish the hours to pass, they need not.” She leaned back, and her hair spilled upon the bedclothes. Her green gown slid off her shoulders and became diaphanous; she licked away the juice and an invitation shone in her eyes.
I stared at her, sorely tempted. Why risk leaving the palace? Why venture anywhere that might raise the storm inside me, bring forth the lightning I was struggling to contain? In here was safety, calm, and everything else I might need.
Fruit ripened on my bedposts, and a golden pear landed in my hand.
I sighed deeply, and one of the red campions sagged upon its stem. “There is business for me to attend to.”
Lileas straightened, and her gown crept back up her shoulders, growing thicker and plainer. Her yellow hair braided itself into a practical tail. She tugged a silk napkin over the rest of the bannocks and concealed the fruit beneath a silver dome. “I had thought you might choose your council today, Your Majesty. Will you be keeping your mother’s advisors and staff?”
Can I trust my mother’s advisors and staff?Someone, possibly one of them, may have done my mother harm. “Were you among them?”
Lileas shook her head. “’Twas more than eighteen years ago, and I had not yet taken up my palace service. But Lyel served as Queen Una’s page.”
I grinned, imagining the handsome knight as a youth in bright livery, with a jaunty bonnet on his silky hair. “Well, I shall keep you both among my advisors, if you so desire.”
Lileas turned to me as a heliotrope towards the sun, relief spreading across her face. “I do desire it.”
“You will have to help me with the others. I have no clue whom I can trust and whom I cannot.”
Amadan being chief among the latter,I supposed.
