Thomas laughed then. “For who? The mice? Besides, you have seen me eat. Did ye think there would be any leftovers?” He tucked his head in the crook of my neck and gave me a kiss.
Any other time, I would have returned his affections, would have liked to play, burnt porridge be damned. Instead, I told him, “Well, we shall do so now. It is good luck.” Which was not a bit untrue.
For it is always good fortune to feed the brownies in your home.
I didn’t come on purpose, and I didn’t come to stay.
I came to help Thomas, to be with my shepherd king while he recovered from his injuries. I was his protector, and carer, and I would do everything in my power to keep him safe.
And if some part of me chose this quiet life with a mortal I cared about, because she feared what she might face on the other side of the Veil, I tried my best to pay her no heed.
“Do not go to the forest again,” I pleaded with Thomas, nigh on every day. “If there is aught ye need—firewood, fruit, nuts—send me. I will go.”
“Send you?” Thomas’s eyes twinkled, and the corners of his mouth quirked up. “Sweet maid, what’s to prevent you from being seduced by some elfin swain you meet in the woods and spirited away?”
I had the chance while the Veil was thin, and I did not go.But I thought of Amadan Dubh and my breath caught in my throat. Was he in the forest, still? I had not seen him at Beltane, unless he was indeed the uncanny wolf...
Thomas thought he heard piping at first, and I had smelled the scent of musk and forest loam, something innocent gone corrupt and foul. Now let me look, and see if the Dark Fool bore my rountree brand across his cheek. That would reveal the truth.
Thomas cut off my train of thought. “Och, the sorts of beings which dwell in Carterhaugh!” He scrunched his face, making his fingers into claws. “Trows and redcaps and other creatures to wish ye ill, rar!” And he grabbed me by the shoulders, nuzzling behind my neck.
I swatted him away.You have attracted far worse. What wrong did ye do to my people, Thomas, to attract the attention of that monstrous wolf?Or, because the fae sense of time is so tricky, I must ask,What wrong have ye yet to do?
“Do ye remember meeting aught in Carterhaugh, Thomas?” I asked, keeping my tone light and casual. “On Beltane Eve, perhaps? The mind can play tricks on you, when the night is dark, and you are injured and afraid.”
The light of laughter fell from his eyes. His handsome face grew sober, his brow knit in puzzlement. “Nay,” he said simply. “I remember only a wolf who chased me, and that I hurt my leg. And, of course, the wood nymph who walked me home and saved me.” He grinned and kissed the side of my face. “The one I now owe my life.”
My heart clenched, and my mouth went dry as sand. He jested, but it came out as truth.
Yet by oak and ash, by the Seelie and Unseelie, the trooping and the solitary fae, woe betide my shepherd king if ever the debt came due.
Fourteen
The dish of milk wasempty.
Every morning when I awoke, I found that to be true.
Thomas kept me awake at night, distracting me from my housekeeping, plying me with kisses and wandering hands. Never did I have a chance to sweep away the cobwebs behind the kist in the corner, or to clean up the pottage when it had boiled over on the hearth. Yet in the morn when we woke, all was clean. Thomas thought me a miracle worker and kissed me on the side of my cheek.
I alone knew I was not responsible. A brownie must be in this house.
I felt them there, their presence buzzing like a bee against my skin. And they must sense me, whether they recognized me or no, for fae does call to fae.
Then why did the brownie not show itself?
I was starved for fae company. The weight of things I must yet hide from Thomas fell heavily upon me, the questions I had about who I truly was, until it might break me in two. I longed for someone I could confide in, and resolved, when the opportunity presented itself, to see this brownie with my own eyes. If it was then offended and wished never to speak with me again, so be it. At least I had tried.
My chance came one evening when Thomas’s leg was acting up, and he had difficulty falling asleep. In general, his leg was healing well, and I took a great pride in that, but the weather had taken a strange turn this day, the air growing thick and moist and gradually erupting into rain. I did think Thomas might be sensitive to such changes from now on, thanks to his injury, and it secretly pleased me. He would be attuned to the natural elements just like a fae.
For now, he needed a stronger medicine than usual. I prepared for him a special valerian elixir before bed, putting my faith in the teachings of Mairi Grieve. ’Twould not harm him if I had brewed it properly, only send him into a long and restful sleep.
But Thomas slept like the dead. His face seemed unnaturally pale, and his arms lay folded across his chest, as if he were in his tomb. I was reminded of those days I watched the body of Mairi Grieve, and my heart did a double beat.I gave him too much.
I plopped down on the bed so quickly it bounced, and Thomas, living, breathing, healthy Thomas moaned in his sleep. What had I been thinking? His color was good; the pallor I had seen must have been all in my head. I should have trusted my instincts, and the training Mairi had given me. All the same, I reached out to touch his cheek, let my fingertips brush across the stubble, needing to touch his warm skin.Do not frighten me like that, my shepherd king. You will take part of me with you when you go.
Then I froze, for a familiar scuttling sound came from the corners of the cottage.
Cullen the dog began to growl, low and deep in the back of his throat, as he stared intently at the corner of the room.
