“No.”
With a sigh, he said, “Fine, the trunk it is.”
If Vlad hauled me off, Heaven would be left in Vermont with nothingbut a couple of crates of coconut water and no skills. I relented. “How about we continue this conversation tomorrow? Right now, just go to your hotel.”
He scoffed. “I agree to continuing the conversation, but I’m not staying at a hotel.”
“No,” I said. “You’re going to get in the way.”
“No, I won’t.”
“What about my date tomorrow?” I narrowed my gaze.
“Why should I care if you go on one date with a mortal? I’m not the jealous type. You, on the other hand.” He gave me a knowing look. “At any rate, where would I stay without exposing myself? It’s either your place or I sleep in the car. I’ll even pay.”
“Deal,” Heaven interrupted. “It’ll be $300 a night.”
I turned to look over my shoulder at Heaven standing on the lawn, grinning. “What? We need the money.”
Tonight was my hot date with Tyrone. If I was in LA, I’d put on something tight and low-cut, but this was a different world. What does a former cheerleader who used to volunteer at a soup kitchen on the regular wear to have hot chocolate with a Christmas tree farmer?
I poked my head in Heaven’s room. “Hey, Heaven. I have a date tonight—”
I stopped abruptly at the sight of her. She appeared to be melting in front of some sort of overbright lamp.
“Ugh! What is that abomination?” I cried out, covering my eyes. “Isn’t it giving you a migraine?”
“A SAD lamp. Haven’t you seen one before?”
“Turn it off.” I peered at her through my fingers. “It burns.”
“No, it’s for seasonal affective disorder. It replicates sunlight.”
I backed out of the room. “Heaven!” I cried, “I’d rather you do meth.”
“Like what you’re doing is healthy?” she said with indignation.
“What’s the matter with what I’m doing? You’re just thirsty,” I said before she could answer.
“Actually, I am,” she shot back. “I’m dying of thirst all the damn time! But I’m still right.”
I could see this wasn’t the right time to consult her on my outfit. “Is Vlad still asleep?” Last night, he’d brought a coffin into the largest bedroomon the second floor, insisting that we hadn’t done an adequate job of blocking the light for him to sleep without one.
“He must be,” Heaven said. “I don’t get the coffin thing. You don’t need a castle, a butler, and lavender essence just to take a nap. The rest of us make do all the time,” Heaven said.
At the moment, I didn’t care why Vlad wanted to sleep in a box because it suited my purposes. I tiptoed into Vlad’s room, pausing every few feet to listen for him stirring. Once I was sure he was asleep, I stood as far away from the coffin as possible and strained on tippy-toes to reach for the latch. With one quick movement, I flipped it.
A groggy throat-clearing noise came from inside the coffin. “Tiffenie, is that you?”
I blew out my hair and curled it just so around a winter hat with a pompom. For my outfit, I went simple with jeans and a red turtleneck.
In the other room, Vlad began roaring in his coffin. When Heaven’s eyes went wide with fear, I said, “It’s fine. Let him out ten minutes after I leave.” There was no way he wasn’t going to pop out of that coffin and do his best to scare Tyrone away. “How does my makeup look?” I asked, fluffing my hair.
“Tiffenie!” Vlad pounded on the coffin lid. Then silence, followed by “Let me out this instant!”
Heaven studied my face. “Maybe some more blush. You still look a little dead.”
“That’s the hardest part to get right,” I said. The line between alive and clown was thinner than you’d think.
