Suddenly all the steam went out of him. He let out a little cry and sank down to the floor. “It’s not fair that we had to lose so much,” he cried out. “I want my dad.”
Before he knew it, both Caleb and Xavier were down on the wooden floor with him with their arms around him, comforting him. He was blubbering like a baby, and he couldn’t seem to stop. Everything he’d been holding inside him was bubbling over. His whole body heaved and shuddered.
“I’m sorry, Landon,” Caleb said, squeezing him tightly. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.”
“Everything’s going to be all right,” Xavier said, rubbing his back in a circular motion.
He continued to cry until he had no more tears inside him. When he finished, Landon looked at his brothers through red, puffy eyes.
“I miss him and I know that maybe the two of you don’t, but just thinking about him being all alone in Moose Falls makes my stomach hurt,” Landon confessed. “I don’t have anyone to talk to about it.”
“You can always talk to us,” Caleb said, gripping his shoulder. “And you’re wrong. We both miss Dad just as much as you do.”
“You do?” Landon asked, swiping at his eyes.
“Of course we do,” Caleb chimed in. “We just keep it to ourselves because there’s nothing we can do about it. We just have to suck it up.”
Landon heard the sadness laced in Caleb’s voice. It made him want to cry all over again. He hated being sad, but he disliked knowing Caleb and Xavier were feeling this way even more.
“I think sending him a present is a great idea,” Xavier said. “Let’s make two lists. Okay?”
Landon vigorously nodded. He hated the idea of his dad waking up on Christmas morning with no family and no presents under the tree.
Once again, they began tossing out ideas as Landon wrote them all down. A leather belt. A new knit hat. An ugly Christmas sweater. In the end they decided upon a book and some soaps for their mother and a knit hat for their dad.
“What happens if Santa doesn’t know our new address?” Landon asked. He bit his lip as he awaited a response from his brothers. If anyone knew the answer, it would be them.
Caleb let out a snort and rolled his eyes. Xavier jabbed him with his elbow.
“Hey, that hurt,” Caleb complained, reaching for his side and grimacing.
“It was supposed to,” Xavier muttered. “Landon, you don’t need to worry about that,” Xavier reassured him. “Santa has a registry of addresses, and they always get updated every week. Mom wrote to him right after we moved, and she gave him our new address.” He looked over at Caleb. “Isn’t that right, Caleb?”
Caleb let out a cough, then began to vigorously shake his head. “Absolutely,” he said. “’Cause it wouldn’t be fair if the kids who moved got cheated out of presents. That’s like against the law or something. We deserve love too.” All three of them chuckled, with Caleb laughing the loudest.
“Thanks, guys,” Landon said, grinning so hard his cheeks hurt. “It’s been worrying me,” he admitted.
Landon felt a lot better simply sharing his fears with his older brothers. They always made everything better. And things had been tough lately. Moving from Moose Falls to Arizona had been hard for him. He hadn’t complained or talked about it much. He and his brothers had made a pact to protect their mother’s feelings no matter what.
“She’s doing everything she can to make a life for us. We can’t let her down,” Xavier had said.
Xavier’s words always played in his head like a recording. He understood the assignment even though he was only seven years old. He wasn’t just smart, he was empathetic. Sometimes it wasn’t good to be this way, because everyone thought he was overly sensitive, but he just absorbed the emotions of others and responded to them. So when his mother was crying her eyes out over leavingMoose Falls and their father, Landon soaked it all up like a sponge.
She still loved his dad. He knew it just like he knew that his brothers loved their dad even though they were both angry at him for messing things up with their mother. Sometimes everything went around and around in his head until he felt dizzy. He was finding out that sometimes love was complicated.
Daisy was afraid she’d bitten off more than she could chew by leaving Alaska and her sons’ dad. Whenever his mother used those words, Landon thought of his grandmother. It was one of her favorite expressions. Hattie Stone was a legend in Moose Falls. Everyone said so. He missed her something fierce. And with Christmas coming up, he knew that he would miss every single thing about Alaska.
Landon hadn’t told anyone what he had written to Santa. He’d sent the letter to the North Pole address at the post office and borrowed a few stamps from his grandfather. So, if his wish was ignored, he would know that Santa was as real as Bigfoot.
Christmas morning, he raced downstairs with Xavier and Caleb at his heels. Their mother came down behind them, yawning with every step she took. Daisy watched as Landon and his brothers ripped through their presents. Every time he opened one, Landon held his breath in anticipation.Please please please, Santa.
When he ripped open the last present, he let out a loud squeal of excitement. A telescope. The one thing he’d truly wanted from Santa. His mother looked over at him and smiled. He jumped up and began dancing around the livingroom while his family looked on. His grandpa reached his hand out and high-fived him.
And in that moment Landon knew two things: Santa Claus was 100 percent real. And he was going to miss living in Moose Falls for the rest of his life.
