He nodded without saying a word, his jaw tightly clenched.
A few minutes later and Lily was sitting happily at the table, eating mac ’n’ cheese and applesauce, and drinking a cup of chocolate milk. For the moment, all was right in her world.
Sophia turned toward Donny. “Let’s go in my study,” she suggested, leading the way down the hall. This way they could talk in private without listening ears.
Once they were in the room, Donny sank down onto a love seat while Sophia sat down on the couch. She was going to let Donny lead the conversation, even though she was eager to find out what happened during the overnight. It wasn’t like their daughter to act like this.
“In case you were wondering, she had an awful time. I think she might just hate me,” Donny muttered.
“What happened?” she asked, feeling stunned. “She loves spending time with you.” This was a first. Lily had never been upset after a visit with her dad.
“She kept telling me she missed you, which I totally understood, but then she wasn’t listening to or engaging with me. I guess you could say she shut down,” Donny explained. “And her room, which she used to love, was now too pink and too big. Nothing was making her happy.”
Sophia ran a hand through her hair and let out a sigh. He might as well have been talking about someone else’s child. Lily loved pink. And she had told Sophia on numerous occasions how much she loved her bedroom at her daddy’s house.
“She might have just been having an off day,” Sophia told him. Even though she and Donny weren’t at a good place with each other, she hated this turn of events. He looked despondent. She wanted Lily to be a happy, well-adjusted child who enjoyed the time she spent away from Sophia.
He held up his hands. “You win. Lily made it clear thatshe’s not ready to be with me half of the time.” He held up his hands. “Don’t worry. I didn’t say a word to her about joint custody, but her actions spoke volumes. She’s not ready for things to change so drastically.”
She narrowed her gaze as she looked at him. “What are you saying, Donny?”
“I’m not going to fight our custody agreement. It makes no sense to force something that isn’t working.”
He had changed his mind about fighting for custody! Relief flooded through her. The idea of being engaged in a court battle had been unnerving. But she didn’t feel as elated as she would have imagined. If Lily wasn’t happy, then Mama wasn’t happy.
“First of all, I don’t consider this winning. You and Lily having a good relationship is beneficial for all of us, especially Lily. I hate that you wanted fifty-fifty custody, but it has nothing to do with my being against you.” She took a deep breath. “The truth is, you haven’t earned the privilege yet. You need to understand that simple fact. Second of all, giving up on your daughter isn’t cool, Donny.”
He blinked back tears. “What do you want me to do? I-I’m trying to make up for lost time, and it’s difficult to have a door slammed in my face.” His voice trembled. Uncertainty radiated from his eyes.
“I want you to keep trying,” she said fiercely. “You don’t think I get frustrated being a single mother? Everything isn’t always peaches and cream, I can tell you that. But I never give up, because to do so would be to turn my back on our daughter. And I’ll never do that.” She locked gazes with him. “And neither should you.”
His brow furrowed as he studied her. “Why are you encouraging me to be involved with our daughter? After all I’ve done and failed to do.”
“Because it’s the right thing. And that always trumps anything else,” Sophia said.
Donny stood up. “I’m not going for fifty-fifty custody.” He twisted his mouth. “I’m going to spend some time building a solid foundation for my relationship with Lily. That’s all I want, to make up for the things I failed to do before now. Zora and I plan on having kids, and before that ever happens, I want to be the father I should’ve been from the beginning. I just want to be a part of her life and for her to know that I was present.”
“I respect that, Donny,” Sophia said, standing up to face him.
“I’m sorry, Sophia. For everything I put you through and for letting Lily down. I know it might be hard to believe, but those days are over.”
She heard something laced in his voice that made her believe him. Maybe she needed to believe that redemption was possible.
“Is it okay if I say goodbye to Lily?” he asked.
“Of course,” she said, following at a discreet distance as Donny found Lily in her playroom and exchanged a heartfelt embrace with her. Lily appeared to have forgotten all about whatever had been bothering her, and she wrapped her little arms around Donny with enthusiasm.
“I love you, Daddy,” she said, gifting him with a heartwarming smile.
“I love you, bitsy,” he said, pressing a kiss on her cheek before turning back toward the entryway.
Donny left without any more discussion about their daughter. They had said all they’d needed to say and reached common ground.
Sophia was stunned by this sudden turn of events. Donny had revealed himself to her in a way she’d never seen before. He’d been incredibly emotional and transparent.
And with that realization, something settled in her chest. For so long she had been angry at Donny for the way he had treated her during their relationship. His failings as a father had infuriated and saddened her. But now she saw what she’d never seen before. Vulnerability. She had always known he loved Lily, but now she saw regret and a desire to turn things around. She didn’t believe he had earned the right to joint custody, but as he’d just said, Donny would always be her baby girl’s father. He needed to be in Lily’s life. She would do everything in her power to support their relationship.
Maybe, just maybe, things could be different moving forward, if for no other reason than her daughter’s best interest. She wasn’t absolving him of anything. She actually didn’t even have to like him as a person. They simply had to work together to benefit Lily. Based on their heart-to-heart conversation, things were definitely moving in the right direction. And for that, she was incredibly grateful.
