His vision blurred as he returned to the line, the dull roar of the audience echoing in his ears.
Thankfully, there was a short break before announcing the winner, giving everyone the opportunity to vote on their phones, refresh their drinks, and place any last-minute bids. But it felt like he’d barely had a chance to splash water on his burning face before they were being ushered back onstage again for the final results.
He half listened as Daniela explained that the runners-up would also be allocated smaller portions of the donations for the organization of their choice. Second runner-up was awarded to Khalid, representing the Crested Peak Land Trust, and first runner-up went to Bert, who was, unsurprisingly, supporting the library.
Niko grinned and applauded, trying to ignore the rush of disappointment. That was that, then. There was no way he waswinning the whole thing. He felt like he drifted out of his body for a moment, watching himself clap for whoever the winner was—but he jolted back into himself when he realized that nobody had stepped forward, and Daniela was looking straight at him with an open-mouthed smile.
He blinked, his head desperately swiveling from side to side, his mouth hanging open. Sure enough, every other guy on the line was smiling at him, too, clapping him on the back, holding their hands out to shake. He stepped forward on unsteady legs as the audience got to its feet as one.
When he turned his head, he saw Merritt was next to him, holding the sash emblazoned withMr. Crested Peak. (An argument about whether to get crowns had wasted almost an entire meeting, with the noes eventually winning out.)
He ducked his head so she could place it across his chest. She was mouthing something at him, beaming, but he had no idea what the fuck it was. Before she could pull away, he put his hand on her arm and tugged her into a hug, too overwhelmed to care if it was a bad idea. It didn’t matter, though, because soon they were surrounded by all the other contestants, the hug growing to consume half the stage, he and Merritt in the center, the eye of the hurricane.
That was when he truly understood that his victory had less to do with his performance tonight, and more with his performance over the last eight years.
He closed his eyes, fighting back tears, and finally allowed himself to be embraced.
25
Merritt lost track of Nikoas soon as she got offstage, pulled away by the chaos surrounding his win. The last glimpse she caught of him, laughing and dazed, before being swallowed into a mass of people made her heart feel like it was expanding past the walls of her chest. She, on the other hand, was hit with a wave of exhaustion, her social battery fully drained. She pulled out her phone and wrote him a brief but enthusiastic text of congratulations, letting him know she was going home and to come pick her up whenever he was done.
She wove through the crowd, looking for Olivia and Dev to see if they were ready to go. But when she spotted them, her heart shriveled right back up again, falling, unobstructed, into her toes.
Olivia was leaning against the wall next to the front door, arms crossed, mouth set in a thin, unhappy line, as Dev inclinedhis head toward her, talking quietly, clearly trying to soothe her. She shook her head firmly.
Merritt swallowed.
This probably had nothing to do with her. She shouldn’t jump to conclusions.
Just then, Olivia saw her, and her gaze darkened even further. She pushed herself off the wall and walked briskly out the front door, Dev on her heels.
Maybe jumping to conclusions was the right move, after all.
Merritt quickened her pace, closing the distance between them as she followed them outside.
“Liv.Olivia,” she called, and her sister stopped short, then turned on her heel.
“Is it because I asked you not to?” Olivia’s face was pale, her voice strained. “You just couldn’t fucking resist?”
Merritt stopped, too, several yards shy of where Olivia stood, reticent to get any closer.
Dev looked between the two of them, uncomfortable. “Listen, I think this is all a misunder—”
“No,” Merritt interrupted, responding to both of them at once. She’d been sure that she and Niko hadn’t been too obvious up there, but of course, nothing got by Olivia. “I’m not—I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not telling you. It’s just…we wanted some time to figure things out first.”
Olivia’s chin crumpled and she looked away, but not before Merritt saw a whole range of emotions—anger, disappointment, worry—flicker over her face.
When she spoke again, her voice was low.
“I really, really hope you know what you’re doing.”
Olivia met Merritt’s eyes again, her face set, and Merritt felt like she’d been headbutted in the stomach. It was the expressionof someone who’d been let down too many times by someone who no longer had the luxury of the benefit of the doubt.
She thought about how she’d missed Olivia’s college graduation because she’d gone to a party hosted by her touring drummer, and instead of getting on her flight to the East Coast the next morning, she’d somehow found herself on a spontaneous road trip to Taos, “borrowing” both his girlfriend and his car.
She thought about how she’d attended their wedding in the haze of her umpteenth breakup with Adrian, getting so drunk she’d lost her shoes, throwing herself around the dance floor like she was performing her own exorcism, not even realizing she’d slashed her foot open until she noticed the spiral of bloody footprints in her wake.
Of course she had no fucking idea what she was doing, and Olivia knew that better than anyone. Maybe better than Merritt herself did. She flushed from head to toe with the shame of being seen in the most unflattering light possible, made even worse by the knowledge that it was exactly what she deserved.
