‘Again – what?’
‘Regret it. Realise it’s not what you want at all. Not long-term, anyway. She thought if you – someone clever and relatable – went through the whole process and then decided you didn’t want it, people might pay attention. It would do a lot more than a damning review inGlowgetter.’
I take another sip of my drink. ‘I still don’t get it.’ I really, really don’t.
‘When Yuvana offered the trial, Merlyn and I were horrified at the concept, but we decided not to say anything, as we were also part of the selection process. We knew the best way to shutthe whole thing down would be from the inside out. Anyway, all the usual names came up – the big influencers like me, Imani and Lily from@LuxeLooksWithLily. But Merlyn and I thought, actually, we could do some good with this. Not just hand it over for someone to make themselves even more famous. So we thought of you – someone who would ask questions, I suppose. Well, she thought of you. She always does, it seems.’
‘I still don’t get it.’
‘Erica, you’re so funny, so clever, but always so desperate to look younger. Merlyn and I talked about it a lot. I love being older – so does she. Even when I was getting trolled I was proud to be a Wise Woman. Wise Women don’t give a crap!’
She pauses and I can see she looks almost tearful. ‘We got quite emotional when we first saw you transformed on Instagram, really hoping it would make you rethink your whole obsession with youth… Break the spell, I suppose.’ She trails off.
I feel a rising anger. How dare they? I’m not their pet project. I don’t need fixing. Although this does explain why I was picked over the heavyweight influencers. I never could work that out.
‘That was a risky thing to do,’ I say. ‘I mean… how did you and Merlyn know I would even want to reverse the treatment?’
‘We didn’t. And at the end of the day, it was up to you. Nobody forced you into it. But we had faith in you.’ She winks like she does on her reels and takes a gulp of her cocktail. ‘My reels and the press thing were just to move it all along a bit more quickly, what with Devon coming back.’
I drain my drink, put the glass on the coffee table and stand up, looking around the room as if the answers are hanging from the walls. It’s a lot to take in. Merlyn has always looked after me, but this is next level, life changing, fairy godmother stuff. The ball I’m going to… or trying to go to at least, could be a happier life. And that would be quite the party – if I can get there, that is.
Now the tears come – and come, and come, and drip down onto my onesie. I make a big snorting snivelling noise. ‘JEEZ, Cassia. What am I supposed to do now? This has really backfired. I need to go and visit my mum, she’s ill in hospital and doesn’t recognise me like this. It’s not just that either. My friendships are in tatters, and to top it all, Dr Marcus has gone missing, so I don’t even know if they are going to be able to reverse it. What if I’m stuck like this?’
‘I know, I know. I’m sorry, sweetie. This is why I came over, to see how you are. And see if I can help.’ She stands up and puts her hands on my arms, as though holding me up. It’s a bit weird. I haven’t been this close to her in a long time. I look at her face. She’s really different to how she seems in her reels, much more… human, I suppose. I suddenly don’t hate her as much as I thought.
‘Cassia,’ I say, feeling like this is the moment to finally get it off my chest. ‘I was really hurt when you got the assistant editor job atBeautique. I wanted it so much. But I know how you got it, about the whole Egon thing. It’s okay.’
‘The whole Egon thing?’
‘Yeah, Egon, from the board. I mean, your dad was friends with him, right?’
‘Erm… yes. But that’s not why I got the promotion.’
‘What?’
‘I got it because of the “pro-ageing” issue I mocked up for the interview.’
I must be staring open-mouthed because she goes on. ‘It had Joanna Lumley on the cover, and the headline “Grand Old Age”. I was really pleased with it. What did you do for yours?’
I think about my stick-on eye serum sample and ‘Young Ho!’ headline and cringe so much about my obsession with youth that I almost shudder.
‘Oh… it doesn’t matter now.’ I sniff and try a smile, glad of her half-hug. I’m getting bored of asking myself how I could have been such an idiot. So I change the subject. ‘Did you say you were trolled?’
‘Oh yes, relentlessly. For my hairy chin, my grey hair, turkey neck, you name it. So I thought, you know what, I’m just going to go completely grey, wear specs, stop getting my lips done – embrace it all. It’s better than the alternative.’ She releases her grip on me and walks back over to the kitchen.
I think about poor Erica Pells from Ava, Missouri, and nod, picking up my drink and draining the last of it. It’s making my cheeks pink.
‘D’you want another?’ says Cassia, already pouring things into the cocktail shaker.
‘I thought you were only allowed one. You know,hashtag mindfuldrinking?’
‘Don’t believe everything you see on social media.’
This is what Father Pells would have called ‘a turn up for the books’.
Three Corpse Revivers later and Cassia and I are sitting in the deckchairs on the balcony.
‘It’s so noisy here,’ says Cassia as a siren blares in the street below.
