I smack him upside the head.
“Ouch,” Tyler says, rubbing his temple.
“Good. It was supposed to hurt,” I say.
Jason comes to my rescue as he answers Tyler. “That won’t happen. Want to know why?”
“I do,” Corbin says.
Jason squeezes my biceps with affection. “Because Rowan’s unstoppable even when he’s up against some fierce opponents—and he’s got an open mind about dating. Don’t you, Rowan?”
Why do I feel like Jason’s selling this to my friends? No—not to them.To me. “Do I?” I counter, full of skepticism.
“C’mon,” Jason says. “This is going to be good. It’s about time, isn’t it?” He shoots me an earnest look, like he believes this cookie swap might lead to something real, and I feel a little shitty about my plan to fake my way through all his sister’s setups.
Only a little.
“Whatever happened to your words from the other day?” I say, deflecting. “It’ll be good, even if it’s not forever?Now, you’re saying it’s going to be forever? Make up your mind, man.”
Jason rolls his eyes. “It’s just cookies. But it’s alsonotjust cookies. It’s a start. A real start. One date can lead to another. And then to…who even knows.” He finishes with a hopeful smile.
Ah, shit. Jason really believes there’s someone out there for damaged old me. He believes in—gulp—the possibility of forever. It’s nice and all that Jason thinks I deserve love. But the reality is, romance doesn’t grab a mic and sayyou deserve melike a talk show host doling out cars as gifts. Romanceisa car. It can still break down and leave you stranded on the side of the road, taking care of the kid all by yourself, and having to explain to her why her mom left.
I don’t want my best bud to get too hooked on the idea of me signing up for forever, or evensomething real.“Itkind of feels like just cookies,” I point out, digging the spoon into the batter again.
“Nope,” Jason says, shaking his head. “It’s you—putting yourself out there. That’s a big deal. That’s why we’re all here, right?”
He sounds like a coach, making a speech before the playoffs. With zero sarcasm, Corbin chimes in with a “hell yes.”
Tyler gives me a genuine smile as he seconds him. “Yup. We’re here for you.”
Jason turns back to me. “Proud of you for putting yourself out there.”
Guilt worms through me like a marble, rolling around. I stare intensely at the tray as I drop another spoonful of batter onto it. Jason’s such a glass-half-full, hopeful guy, but I’m not sure he’d be so proud if he knew what I was up to. Not sure he’d be so proud either that I’d been thinking dirty thoughts about his sister.
A dark cloud swirls over me. I hate letting my friends down, especially Jason, since he’s been with me through thick and thin. “We’ll see,” I say, hoping that’s enough for him for now.
But when I look up from the tray, my best friend’s eyes flash with…disappointment. Shit. I really hate letting him down. “Hey, I’m going tomorrow, aren’t I?”
We get to work making ganache while I try not to think about Isla taking a bite of a peanut butter blossom cookie.
14
A TOUGH CHRISTMAS NUT
ISLA
“You can’t host a Christmas cookie swap without mistletoe,” I say with a smile, stretching on the step ladder to add another sprig to an archway inside High Kick Coffee. “Right, Birdie?”
The former Vegas showgirl and owner of the shop gives me a decisive nod from the front counter, where she’s arranging a string of green garlands. She lets me host matchmaking events here from time to time, like today. The shop’s technically closed, but she’s keeping it open on a Saturday night for this private event. She’s a lover of love, and she’s also the grandmother of Tyler and Miles Falcon from the Sea Dogs.
“I’m pretty sure you would be arrested by the Underground Grandma Matchmaking Society if you skimped on the good stuff,” she says, hanging a section of the greenery alongside Leighton.
My photographer friend adjusts the garland and flashes Birdie a playful look. “You would know, since I think you’re the president of that now, aren’t you?”
Birdie presses a finger to her plum-lipsticked mouth,then flicks her red-and-silver feather boa jauntily around her neck. “Don’t tell a soul—I was promoted.”
“Your secret is safe with me,” Leighton says, then meets my gaze. “You know Birdie was instrumental with all of her underground machinations for Miles and me.”
