“Too many endorphins too fast. You’ll crash. Let me hold you so you can come down gently.”
We stand for a few minutes as I run my fingers through his hair, holding him as tightly as he lets me.
When his shoulders slump, I look down at him. “Good?”
“Good. Thank you. I was feeling… a little out of it.”
“It’s okay. Let me grab my bag and I’ll walk you to your room.”
Luca waits patiently as I pack up and shut down my computer.
Once finished, I hold out my hand and Luca quickly takes it. Pulling him into me, I tip his chin up and kiss him gently. Luca places his hands on my chest, his body pressed close to mine.
Breaking the kiss, I thumb his bottom lip, smiling as he sucks in a shaky breath. “Do you have my number, Luca?” I ask, staring into his beautiful brown eyes.
“Yes?”
Smirking, I ask, “Is that a question?”
“No.” His cheeks turn a bright shade of pink. “I have it. Dylan gave it to me when he offered me the position. He told me to never use it.”
“I’m telling youtouse it. Call me, day or night, if you need me. For any reason. You understand?”
“Yes,” he whispers. “I will. Thank you. For helping me today.”
“Call me if you ever need it again.”
His smile is so bright, so fucking brilliant, it starts to melt that bullshit ice block in my chest.
Fuck, no. I can’t. I can’t give him more than what he’s asking for.
I can’t give him my heart.
Chapter
Thirteen
LUCA
That wasthe first night I dreamed of Maddox Levine.
I can say without a doubt having Zander shake me awake because I was makingdistressed soundsis the most awkward thing that has ever happened to me.
Even a cool shower couldn’t clear my mind. All I could think about was Professor Levine’s face when he was being so soft and tender, and the way that he walked me back to my dorm room just like he said he would.
At least by the time I came out of the shower, Zandy was back in bed, sawing logs loud enough to hurt my ears and probably dreaming about his scary boyfriend. I, on the other hand, couldn’t fall back to sleep.
I can completely blame my embarrassment over my nearly wet dream for the way my eyes have bags under them when I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror while I’m brushing my teeth the next morning.
“Jesus,” I mutter, dragging my fingers through my hair like it will somehow make the evidence of my shame go away. The only thing it does is get digits caught in a knot, and the little yelp of pain I let out is thankfully heard by me and me alone. I stillpeek out to make sure the dorm room is empty before I rinse my mouth out, leaning my head against the bathroom door.
When I’d gone to Professor Levine’s office last night and asked him to help me clear my head, I wasn’t sure what I’d been expecting. Crawling between his legs and holding his half-hard cock in my mouth until my mind whited out and all I could feel was the warmth of his skin and the weight of him against my tongue was not on my list of guesses.
It wasn’t even in my realm of possibility.
But now that I’ve done it… now that I know what he tastes like, what it feels like to fly to whatever place he took me…
I don’t know how I ever lived without it. I don’t know if I’m going to be able to stop myself from wanting it again.
